ShortStacks by Mark Magiera

A Reckoning

Mark Magiera — Tue, 03 Nov 2026 19:11:33 GMT

I’m still gonna be on the boat…hiding away. If you feel I need to know something that would make me very happy, text or call me. That’s the note a friend sent me recently. He’s been planning to sequester himself, enjoy the Southern California sunshine, maybe listen to some music, and not tune into the election results today. I wanna watch it for sure, but I feel we’ve been burned so many times I don’t think I could take it. Probably if I’m not involved it’ll go better. He sent this first thing today. I’m already watching the news…(with a handful of emojis)…Why can’t I stop? As for me, I’ve taken my own advice and haven’t been paying too much attention to the weeks of pre-election chatter and won’t be tuning in until the polls start closing this afternoon. Then I’ll be all in, and I’m actually looking forward to it for the first time in a long time. Didn’t feel the need to flee the country, as I did the last couple of times, and still don’t. And I don’t have a boat. But I do have a TV, plenty of nibbles, and a fully stocked bar…which should help me make it through the night. Here’s to hoping.

Customer Service

Mark Magiera — Mon, 02 Nov 2026 19:02:14 GMT

Under…(the unacknowledged)…the Social Security Administration (SSA), the nation’s largest and most trusted government service provider, is transforming into a model of excellence, one that meets and exceeds customer expectations for fast, accurate, and secure service. How’s that for a sales pitch to an aging constituency on the eve of an election? In case you don’t know how things are going these days, or who to vote for, here’s an incentive. And it was all started by the guy with a chainsaw who tried to buy an election in Wisconsin and is trying to buy one in Texas, and various other unfortunate places. How’s that working out? Well, we won’t know until tomorrow, maybe. But, according to the press release, as far as this customer service entity goes, it’s a winner—the best performance ever in its 91-year history. That’s saying something and they want you to know that no matter how old a beneficiary you are, operators are standing by to take your call, and answer any questions about how much money you’re going to get and why it hasn’t arrived yet, with reduced average wait times…under six minutes. So, thank you for placing your trust in the Social Security Administration, thank you for your attention to this matter, and please vote accordingly.

We’re in the Money

Mark Magiera — Wed, 28 Oct 2026 17:21:02 GMT

We’re in the money, We’re in the money, We’ve got a lot of what it takes to get along. That’s the song he should have been singing instead of saying, We’re making a freaking fortune…hundreds of billions of dollars. Not sure who the we is he was talking about. Normally that’s what team players say when they lose themselves, and the I, in team. It was us. We did it together. Even golfers say that, the professional ones with the stick in their hands, staring down at that small white ball and doing the math: who win tournaments and make loads of money. We had a good day out there, the winner will say. And you’re wondering, who’s the we? And it’s not like this cruel, tyrannical, pompous, bombastic gangbanger violently braying his self-importance has ever been part of a team or used the we word before, in regards to anything or anyone. Although maybe hundreds of billions of dollars is worth using the word, for a moment, among the fawning audience he was talking to, as if We’re all in on it, We’re rich, and We can sing the song, too. But that’s not who we is.

Man Babies

Mark Magiera — Sat, 24 Oct 2026 18:53:27 GMT

The manly men of the manosphere are angry, lashing out, and doubling down on whatever it is they’re supposed to be doing and saying, posing and preening as the cameras keep rolling, and trying not to think about what they’ll soon be losing—all those things they took, saying It’s mine and I can have my way with it. Figured it would go on like this forever, and still acting like it will. But the clock is ticking and they were careless people…smashed up things and creatures…and let other people clean up the mess they had made. And that’s what they’ll be leaving us when they’re gone—those smashed up things of great value and worth, and a broken world order that will be difficult to repair—although it will be fun to witness and celebrate as they’re escorted from their offices, heads bowed under the glaring lights, and held accountable. And, in the end, it will just be a bunch of crying boys, pounding on the stubborn ground, in a room full of broken toys.

Empathy Aversion

Mark Magiera — Thu, 22 Oct 2026 19:30:16 GMT

Way back when it used to be Us and Them. A very black and white, evenly-split, red and blue voting thing. Now there’s a third someone, or something—a discrete radical minority: a paranoid, xenophobic, religious nationalist cult. Now it’s blue, red, and MAGA Republicans—White Christian Nationalists whose adherents believe empathy can become dangerous when it leads people away from building a society guided on God’s truth. It’s a disturbing truth and a very different God than the one I knew, or the one that James Talarico believes in. Here’s a reposting of a missive I wrote when he was having a moment—a moment that will continue for the next two weeks or so when we find out what God and Texas have to say and if Elon bought the wrong man.

The Perfect Man

Mark Magiera — Fri, 16 Oct 2026 19:46:58 GMT

Despite all the well-timed for his viewing, unofficial Fox auditions, including that look he continues to surround himself with, and the fawning they do when they get the gig—I am so honored…I would like to thank…for his trust that he has placed in me—it doesn’t always work out, as it didn’t here. I guess her boss wanted something, or someone, else. Not sure exactly what that something is, but he recently gave a few hints—I don’t do this with men very often. I started examining his body. And I looked, and I watched up and down. And I looked at his ass. Maybe he needs a man to do the job? No idea who he’s thinking about to replace her, but I know who it should be—the guy who’s already done the audition and continues to do the fawning. The guy who’ll get down and do as many pushups as ordered, on camera, who’s loaded with Vitamin T and patriotic tattoos, including his boss’s scowling mug likely etched somewhere on his well-toned body. It’s a no brainer. If things don’t work out with his current gig, which many of us have concerns about, I’d encourage his boss to come out, admire and grab Pete’s ass, and be the true man he’s always wanted to be.

Blue Waving

Mark Magiera — Tue, 13 Oct 2026 22:05:01 GMT

A friend asked me what I thought about the firing squad business. I wanted to say, it depends on who they’re planning to shoot. But instead I told them I was focused on the midterms and not listening to anything coming from anyone in the current regime, especially the guy who’ll likely be the first one impeached next year or his boss who, as David Remnick wrote, has the impulse control of a toddler, though most toddlers have neither the authority nor the inclination to spark an insurrection, destabilize the Western alliance, live-stream an execution, or threaten to end a whole civilization. So it’ll definitely remain one day at a time in our house for the next few weeks, with some cautious optimism, until all the votes are cast and counted and we’re out of the woods and on the other side of whatever evil deeds they employ to try and stop the inevitable and change the ending. And, if the coming election does result in a blue wave, (he) will be faced with the fact of his diminishment. The rest of us will be faced with the wreckage. But at least it will be our wreckage…to claim, clean up, and rebuild with no names attached.

The Defendants

Mark Magiera — Thu, 08 Oct 2026 19:20:58 GMT

Who, you may have often asked, are these people? How did…he…gather such a wretched hive of scum and villainy around him? Who, indeed. But I guess we’re going to find out and learn all the names, although it may take a while to unravel things and then tell the stories. The how of it probably won’t be a mystery. The train of corruption was idling in the station for the longest time while he sent out flyers promising attractive returns for anyone with modest skills, if any. Maybe just one. Sign here: stand back and stand by. And they did. By the time it was time to go, the roster was full from top to bottom, front to back. And away they went. Now, it seems, the train will finally stop rolling, or at least be slowing down and likely coming to rest somewhere, and they’ll all have to find a way to get off under a damning headline, a spying camera, or as a guest on Let’s Make a Deal. Some may try to run, pretend it didn’t happen, insist they didn’t do anything wrong, or blame someone else. But eventually the good guys will find them and want to know…where you put the money, how much you got, who gave it to you, what you did to get it, and what the plan is for the rest of your unfortunate life.

Good People

Mark Magiera — Tue, 06 Oct 2026 02:29:03 GMT

Thank you for the most feel-good, positive, lovely evening in a long time. Peace and love all around. That’s the message I got from my White House Letter Writing Friend (who hasn’t written anything in a long while) who joined us at a Jack Johnson concert last week. She obviously enjoyed being there among such a happy audience singing along to the songs, including Where’d All The Good People Go? And she asked me that question—Where’d they go?—and then answered with the gentle wave of her hand. They’re here! she said. And they were. We were. And that should be the title of your next missive. I woke up feeling really good the next morning and took a different path, didn’t write anything, and avoided tuning into a day full of bad news, particularly the ramblings of an unwell man praising himself. And I managed to stay on the right path and wait a weekend before tuning back in and stumbling onto another feel-good music-moment somewhere else—Dave Grohl, wearing an Iowa Hawkeyes T-shirt, at the Power to the People Concert, dedicating the band’s performance of My Hero to my new friend, Jack (a different one). And everyone was singing there, too.

Attention to Detail

Mark Magiera — Thu, 01 Oct 2026 22:45:42 GMT

Fantastic attention to detail, said a friend regarding The “morally binding” accord on developing the (AI) technology safely, signed by the president and leading tech executives at the White House on Sept. 29, (that) includes a misspelling under the president’s signature with “United States” written as “Unites States.” Although maybe it was intentional, as in…the guy who unites states rather than divides them, who brings people and families together rather than tearing them apart. Maybe not. But it definitely doesn’t seem like a mistake that AI would make unless it had a sense of humor, so there must have been real people involved in the idea (Mark Zuckerberg?!) and construction of the sentence, including whoever wrote it, who was supposed to do the editing, and who signed off on it. Heads might be rolling if anyone in the White House is paying attention or actually cares. Apparently not. Meanwhile, here’s a fantastic Substack read about AI from George Saunders, a real writer, who feels that using AI to write is anathema. A thing to be most radically avoided.

On Substack

Model Behavior: George Saunders

Over the summer, we kicked off Model Behavior, a series that asks top writers, thinkers, critics, and creators to tell us honestly how they think about and use AI. Next up we have George Saunders, a true literary titan. In addition to writing award-winning books and short stories, George teaches the craft…

a month ago · 1581 likes · George Saunders and Arielle Swedback

The Schmitt Show

Mark Magiera — Wed, 30 Sep 2026 21:47:56 GMT

In case you missed it, the Senator from Missouri had a moment of infamy yesterday, along with another Senator from Alabama, wearing her modest team necklace, frozen face posterized in disbelief, while the Senator from Louisiana, who always enjoys being in on the fun, put his hands on the evidence and his smiling face in the picture as if the reveal was going to be really good and he wanted to be part of it too. And there they all were, preening for the Gotcha! moment that didn’t quite work out as hastily planned—mixing up a few minor details and maybe not digging quite deep enough to find the obvious truth. Something about Atlanta, basketball, and you were there, weren’t you? He asked. Ah-ha! And we’ve got the receipts, so don’t perjure yourself, he sneered. But Jack was somewhere else and part of a very different game. And then I heard a song, which probably doesn’t fit. Although sometimes you’ve just got to roll with it. Don't you love farce? My fault, I fear. I thought that you'd want what I want, Sorry, my dear. And where are the clowns. Send in the clowns. Don't bother, they're here.

Good Grief

Mark Magiera — Mon, 28 Sep 2026 20:21:22 GMT

I had lunch with a friend recently who I hadn’t seen or talked to in a long while. On a personal level, he’s been going through an admittedly rough patch, as my mother used to say, revisiting a few things from his past that he somehow managed his way around, didn’t deal with, or simply insisted was fine even though it wasn’t, and moved on. Everything is fine, chant it like a mantra, everything is fine, sing it like Sinatra, everything is fine. It’s an approach that works sometimes, for a while anyway, as if it were a minor something that didn’t matter much, that you never gave any significant thought to, and wasn’t a big deal anyway. And it worked for him for a while, until it didn’t. Then something happened and now he’s dealing with it—unloading the baggage and taking a different journey—doing a deep dive, exercising his brain and philosophical muscles and, as Socrates said, living an examined life. He’s grieving, but in a good way—coming up for air and recognizing that it’s OK to be sad and to miss someone—and finally understanding what love truly means.

Hopetimism

Mark Magiera — Fri, 25 Sep 2026 20:24:23 GMT

My friend is worried, but he worries a lot. Particularly these days. The Supreme Court is going to save him again, he said. I’m sure they’ll try, I said. A few moments later, they did. We’re not going to get through the midterms. To be honest, I don’t have the energy and I don’t wanna deal with it anymore. Sounds like someone who’s at the end of his rope and about to jump. With all the negative shit…we’re barely hanging on. They are really good at this and…relentless. I honestly believe the resistance doesn’t have the same kind of energy…and we will not win the midterms because the supreme court will just say that we lost and that’ll be it. I know that sounds far fetched, but can you tell me that can’t happen? Although I’m optimistic about the midterms yet concerned about what might happen afterwards, I didn’t know what to tell him. So I sent him something from Norm Eisen: Page 6 of the decision makes clear that we are in the 90-day statutory window when mass changes cannot be made to voter lists! Yeah it’s a shit decision for the reasons the 3 dissenters say but we can deal with it. It didn’t help. We live with a bunch of fucking American dimwits. Fingers crossed, and then some.

The Arch Enemies

Mark Magiera — Wed, 23 Sep 2026 20:01:36 GMT

It was a warm, supportive, local crowd…clear about its protective mission. The good weather didn’t hurt. That’s what someone said who was part of a human chain surrounding the Kennedy Center last week to defend it from being demolished or renamed again. Apparently the group that organized the rally, Hands Off the Arts, will be keeping watch and on high alert to see if there’s even the suggestion of anything happening, and hopefully help prevent it from happening while everyone else is sleeping so there won’t be another large hole in the ground where something great used to be. And while they are keeping watch, maybe they’ll organize another cluster of resistance at the nearby roundabout to prevent him from even breaking ground on his imaginary 250-foot triumphal arch. It looks like a nice spot to park some beach chairs, pitch a tent, enjoy the view, and shine a bright light on what he’s planning to do and where he’s planning to do it. Call them Arch Enemies. Have hats, t-shirts, and signs made and build a temporary, but necessary community. Put a flag in the ground as if occupying Tom Sawyer Island at Disneyland and owning it. Washington is a beautiful city, said someone else who was there, holding hands and resisting.

Kash, the Insult Dog

Mark Magiera — Thu, 17 Sep 2026 19:07:40 GMT

He was a sweating mess in a chair, shuffling papers, giving orders and non answers, and paging through notes in his Pam B Gone binder to remind himself what nasty things to say to which adversary, and trying to get out of the room as quickly as possible with a win. It was a long day…and then it was over, so he could knock back a few cold ones somewhere private and worry about what his boss would have to say about his performance. But, now that he had a moment to think, it was one of the friendlies—an unfunny comedian—asking the question so he let his guard down and forgot about playing defense, or maybe didn’t understand the reality of what he was talking about and how disturbing and confusing it was to anyone in the room, particularly animal lovers, wondering WTF. Whose side of what, the bestiality? He asked. So you disqualified the animal? Insert smile and laugh here as part of his answer, which is no longer a question you’ll get asked if you’re planning to apply for a job at the current FBI, sparing you the embarrassment of having to explain what you did, with what, and if anyone forced you to do it.

Turn Off the News

Mark Magiera — Tue, 15 Sep 2026 16:56:34 GMT

A friend sent me a Gift link to an Atlantic article by Anne Applebaum today. Mandatory reading, he wrote. I don’t hear from him that often, but when I do it’s always worth paying attention to. So I read it. The clan of predators currently in charge of the U.S. federal government is no different. Wrongly described as “isolationists,” many of its true believers don’t think of themselves as ordinary Republicans who won an election and will temporarily hold power until the next election. Nor are they mere appendages of (him). They believe they represent something much greater: the vanguard of a movement that will alter not just America, but the world. It’s a dark warning, but a good read. And I’d been having such a nice morning. Hadn’t even turned on the news. Still haven’t. Although, at some point, I likely will and there’ll be Anne Applebaum telling her story, which will soon be everywhere. Until then I’ll get back on that different path, listen to Lukas—Turn Off the News and Build a Garden—and then maybe go outside to see what type of day it is, rake leaves and count them.

Going North

Mark Magiera — Fri, 11 Sep 2026 20:05:47 GMT

I just got home from a visit to war-torn Canada. Actually, since nobody is being bombed, buildings destroyed, or lives lost, maybe it is an actual skirmish and not a war of any kind. But, as Paul Krugman wrote, Something more important than trade is being damaged. And I did feel different being there among my Canadian relatives even though they were kind, welcoming, and friendly, because they are and because they understand why they are being asked to suffer this pain…and are defending their sovereignty and their national identity…and…responding—not just politically and economically, but emotionally. They didn’t seem to be suffering at all or emotional, but since I agreed with my Canadian wife not to discuss politics while we were there, I wasn’t able to ask how they were feeling or apologize for the bad behavior of their southern neighbor and the senile old villain, who I’m embarrassed by, ashamed of, and wish I could do something to make go away. So we did all sorts of other, family things as if nothing bad was happening and we weren’t responsible for it. It was a lovely week. Now I’m home, tuning back in to what’s happening here, in this moment and time, and acknowledging that, we can’t change the world, but at least we can embarrass the guilty.

And I Wonder

Mark Magiera — Fri, 04 Sep 2026 20:43:17 GMT

As much as I appreciate and admire the work Sarah is doing, I still wonder why she signed on in his first administration. Wasn’t it obvious then? Or did she think that she might be able to help guide and manage him? Probably a question for another time, and for plenty of others who somehow didn’t see this coming. I wrote this in the comments section after reading an article in The Bulwark by Sarah Matthews, the Deputy Press Secretary in his first administration, who resigned on January 6th, 2021. It’s a question I occasionally ask myself about anyone who was on board with him…until they weren’t. But, I don’t know anyone personally who once was and now isn’t, or ever was. So I put the question out there in the public space, perhaps rhetorically, which created a minor kerfuffle in the mix of comments and answers, that I merely watched. From—She was young and ambitious and So, you have never made a naive choice? To—Wonder all you like. It means nothing and You can welcome us on your side of the barricade. Or not. I personally don’t give a fuck. Although I suspect it’s a question she’s been asked, and answered, many times, I’m still curious. Not that it will change anything. But, you know, Sarah, What were you thinking?

The Bulwark

The MAGA World Incentives That Have Saved Max Miller

IT IS NO SECRET that President Trump has built his “alpha male” persona around a warped version of masculinity in which vulnerability is weakness, cruelty is strength, empathy is feminine, and women are easy targets. It’s also no secret that he’s shaped the Republican party around this ethos…

2 months ago · 673 likes · 231 comments · Sarah Matthews

Looney Tunes

Mark Magiera — Tue, 01 Sep 2026 16:57:31 GMT

Picture the Baby Huey cartoon character, nephew of Donald Duck, sitting in a giant office chair, at an oversized desk, clutching a handful of colored pens and staring at a ginormous coloring book that resembles a map of the world, quacking on about something that none of the characters standing around him truly understand yet try to act like they do and that this is normal. They smile and shake their heads as if saying, Can you believe this? Even though they don’t say anything, don’t know what they can say, and wouldn’t say it if they did. It goes on like this for too long, yet it’s only one moment, among a day full of so many, that you just happened to witness and now can’t forget because you’ve never seen anything like this before in real life, and something seems to have changed since the last time you saw him—not an oversized duck in a diaper, but a large, fat, old man stuffed into a blue suit and a big chair, hair improperly combed over his bald head, waving a pen like a weapon and rewriting an era of history. As if that’s all there is to it, and the nodding heads agree, that this is how we do things, even to our friends—the why and because of everything, and the preview of what it’ll look like when it finally ends.

Everyday People

Mark Magiera — Fri, 28 Aug 2026 16:07:55 GMT

There are such good people in the world, said a friend today talking about Dolly. It’s so heartening to see how beloved she was. It’s certainly an important reminder about things and people that really matter—the good deed-doers, the genuine care about others people, the bring us together, love thy neighbor people who truly try to make the world a better place for everyone. Not the bad guys who destroy things, hate the others, erect statues to themselves, and hijack our happiness, or at least make us occasionally lose sight of it with their non-stop daily assaults led by the guy probably throwing a tantrum right now since this moment is not about him and when will she stop stealing the headline. It’s a sad one, not a bad one, but a genuine loss so many feel—those of us who never sang with her and those who did, including Kermit the Frog. There is a blue one who can’t accept the green one, For being such a rich one that will not help the poor one. Different strokes for different folks, and so on and so on and scooby dooby dooby.