Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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If you are a mom or soon-to-be mom, you have most likely experienced the onslaught of baby products pushed on you from every direction, all claiming to make having a baby easier, better, or somehow more manageable. But what about MOM?!

Before having my son, I felt like I had purchased every baby gadget under the sun. I had spent so much time thinking about what he would need that I didn’t give nearly as much thought to what I would need.

Having a baby completely changes your day-to-day life, your body, your routines, your sleep, and honestly, your entire sense of self. And in those first few weeks, it’s incredibly easy to put yourself at the very bottom of the list.

So today, I’m sharing the things I spent money on, prioritized, or simply made a point of doing that made my postpartum experience a lot easier. These aren’t baby “must haves.” They’re things for MOM… because taking care of yourself should be a priority, especially when you’re learning how to take care of someone else.

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~ Shower and go outside at least once a day

This is probably the best advice I’ve been given for my postpartum journey, and although it seems kinda straight forward, you’d be surprised how hard it is to shower and go outside when you have a newborn on your boob every two seconds. Our doula Cara’s last words to me after leaving the hospital were “Make sure you shower and sit out on your porch at least once a day.” I took her advice to heart and boy, was she right!

When you are freshly postpartum, all of a sudden you have a little human being whose every need comes before yours… it’s easy to forget to do basic things like shower and breath fresh air. But once I started doing this, I realized how important it was and how it greatly affected my mood and overall mental health. It can be kinda challenging to shower because, no matter what kind of birth you had, the physical recovery is A LOT… but being freshly bathed is medicine to your mood. And fresh air… just trust me, you need it.

It became a ritual in the afternoon when my mom would come over… I’d go take a shower then meet her and my baby on the porch. Having those few minutes all alone to take care of myself were greatly helpful.

~ Best Pajama Set

You need a comfy pajama set, and ideally one that is also cute so that 1. You feel good about yourself while you are recovering, and 2. you look cute when people come over to meet your baby.

My favorite pajama set is this one by LAKE… it’s a 3 piece set that is pregnancy bump and breastfeeding friendly. Not only are they the literal most comfiest thing I’ve ever worn, but the breastfeeding top comes with easily snappable straps that make breastfeeding easy, as well as space for a bump so you can wear it while pregnant and not pregnant! The wrap ties easily… I think one time I wore this set to the grocery store while pregnant?… And people were staring because I looked super cute, obviously! (Lol)

~ Vibration plate

Okay... this one has to wait until you are cleared to workout at your 6 week visit but, the vibration plate has changed my life. I swear it helped me drop the water weight. I just stand on it for 10 minutes every morning and then I’m done. It helps with lymphatic drainage and has other benefits like helping aid recovery, circulation, and muscle activation. There are a ton of nice ones available online, but I got this cheaper one off Amazon, and it works just fine.

~ Favorite snack

Caring for a newborn will keep you busy 24/7, so it’s important to have your fridge stocked with your favorite go-to snack. My personal favorite has been Oaties Protien bars by Perfect Bar… They are made with all natural ingredients, one of which being oats which are helpful in keeping milk supply up for all the breast feeding mamas! I personally like the cookie dough flavor, but the brownie flavor is great too. I get them at Whole Foods, but you can also order online

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~ Really hydrating skincare

You need to prioritize taking care of your skin after having your baby!!! I’m going to be honest… in the beginning, it’s hard to remember to do anything to take care of yourself, let alone put on face creams at the end of the day. HOWEVER… prioritizing my skin has been a game changer.

Whatever skincare you choose, make sure it is extremely HYDRATING. This will help you look a little more normal when you start to get bags under your eyes from the sleep deprivation. I recently discovered two products by Laneige that have been life changing… the milky toner and the water cream moisturizer. Both of these together are so nourishing, and my skin drinks up the moisture. I can’t go a day without using both of these products and they are a great price point.

~ Easy to take (but high quality) postpartum vitamins

I’m so bad at remembering to take my vitamins. But it’s really important to replenish your body after pregnancy, so I’ve been making it a point to take my postpartum supplements…. I’ve been taking the Perelel postpartum support multipack and love it because it has all of my postnatal vitamins in a tiny packet. This way, I’m not opening a ton of different pill bottles.

I keep them on my bedside table so I can easily remember to take them before I go to bed every night. I use them so much they gave me a code, hooray! You can get 15% off your Perelel order by using code REIDCOX15%

~ A good hair routine

Postpartum hair loss is a real thing that I’ve been trying my best to get ahead of. Thankfully, I haven’t experienced much of it yet… perhaps that’s all thanks to my hair routine!

Okay, I take the Nutrafol Postpartum Hair Growth Supplement, which is supposed to help prevent hair loss in the first place. I also use a tetrapeptide hair and scalp serum by Snow Fox after I shower and brush my hair with this Gua Sha hairbrush that boosts circulation on the scalp and helps the serum set in.

This is what works for me… I’ve also heard that rosemary oil is good for hair growth so maybe that’s worth a try as well?!

~ Prepared meals / plenty of takeout

Unless you are a connoisseur in the kitchen, don’t even think about trying to cook your own meals. Giving myself permission to lean into grabbing takeout from our favorite local restaurant or doing a prepared meal service truly was our saving grace in the first few months postpartum.

I still haven’t gotten back into cooking dinner like I used to… one time I tried to steam broccoli and ended up burning my hand. Not fun. I’ve personally found it harder to multi task ever since having our son, and I’m definitely not going to try handling a hot stove and him at the same time.

~ Flowy Dresses (size up)

Before you give birth, do yourself a favor and order 2 or 3 flows dresses and go one size up. You want to be comfortable in whatever you are wearing postpartum, and you really have no idea what shape your body is going to be in.

When I first had to leave the house after having my baby, I quickly realized that I was not going to be able to fit into any of my pre pregnancy clothes… got online and rush ordered a few dresses that I wish I had ordered while pregnant so I didn’t have to worry.

This dress by Madewell and this dress by Opia have been two of my favorites. Just set yourself up for success in the clothes department

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- Sauna + Cold Plunge

Another one you have to wait until after you are cleared after your 6 week visit to enjoy, but I swear by doing sauna and cold plunge directly after. Contrast therapy has been probably the #1 thing I’ve done to recover my body and also keep me feeling good as I get the hang of this mom thing.

I love the boost of energy it gives me and my husband can attest to it putting me in a great mood… no matter how sleep deprived I may be.

~ Accept the help

In my twenties, I was definitely that person who had trouble asking for and accepting help. But now that I have a baby, I say “yes, thank you!”

I had a girlfriend come over to visit when I was about 1 month postpartum and she offered to fold my laundry…. My first instinct was to say, “No, don’t worry about it.” But before I could even respond, she was deep into the hamper. I’m so glad I accepted her help because, on that day, it was what I needed.

As new moms, we can easily feel the pressure to have it all together and prove to ourselves and the whole world that we are capable of doing this mom thing…. But if someone offers to help you, it’s important to accept.

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I hope this was helpful. When I became a mom, I felt like I had every baby gadget on the market that would make taking care of my baby easier… But I had to learn quickly that if I was going to get through those first few weeks of postpartum, I was going to have to change the way I cared for myself.

Some of the things listed above seem pretty basic, but when you are in the thick of those early days, taking care of yourself can feel like the last thing on your to-do list. And yet, I quickly realized that the better I took care of myself, the better I was able to show up for my baby. Sometimes the things that make the biggest difference aren’t the fanciest baby products… they’re the little things that make your life a little easier.

~Reid

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Choosing to opt out of being in a hurry to get my old body back after having a baby has been one of the best decisions I’ve made postpartum. I have a severe allergy to the trend of needing to “bounce back” after giving birth. In fact, by choosing to NOT focus on dropping the pregnancy weight, I’ve actually healed my body (and my mind) much quicker than I expected…

When I got pregnant, I knew I was going to be one of those women who would naturally feel the pressure to drop the baby weight soon after giving birth, so I made it a point to set myself up for success early on. This looked like doing work on my mentality around my body image related to pregnancy, as well as getting clear on what I wanted my 4th trimester (the three months after giving birth) to look like. With a history of disordered eating, my biggest concern was that I’d feel pressure to fall back into some bad habits, and I was definitely not going to let that happen during the best season of my life… especially with our child to care for.

In getting clear on what I wanted my first few months of motherhood to be like, I began to resent the notion that women feel this pressure to look like they never had a baby in the first place, when their body had just done one of the most incredible things a human body can do. This special time should be about healing not only physically, but emotionally, spiritually, hormonally… as well as adjusting to the major life shift that taking care of a baby requires. If I was focusing on dropping the pregnancy weight, there would be no room for me to actually enjoy this sweet season.

I am so glad I made the decision early on to not worry about postpartum weight loss because I was able to be fully present in those first few months with my baby instead of constantly thinking about how quickly I could drop the baby weight. Also, giving birth takes a lot of time to recover from, and I’ll be the first to admit I definitely underestimated how much time it would take… I mean, it took 8 whole weeks for me to be able walk around our neighborhood and not feel like I was falling apart. No matter how your birth went, it takes time to heal… this is the time we need to be giving our body so much love, gratitude, and grace. Why would we rob ourselves of the time to heal properly?

Even the idea of “bouncing back” or “getting back to…” implies that we are even capable of going back to our old lives after having a baby when NEWS FLASH!!!… That’s impossible.

There’s a huge part of new mom culture that focuses on “getting back.”

• Getting back your pre baby body

• Getting back to work

• Getting back to your old routine

• Getting back your prior relationship dynamic

• Getting back time to yourself … (HA!)

But I keep asking myself: Why would I want to go back? If I tried to return to the person I was before motherhood, it would feel completely misaligned. I’m not the same person I was before I became a mother. There’s no going back. There’s only moving forward as this new version of myself. And what an incredible opportunity to start fresh!

I’ve come to find that by not trying to “get back” my pre baby body, I’ve actually gotten the results I was hoping for all along. I am a little over four months postpartum, and I have not been to the gym once… yet I find the weight slowly falling off in a way that feels right for me.

Rejecting bounce back culture, for me, looked like focusing more on recovering my body rather than trying to make it look a certain way. I chose to take actions that nourished my body, but only when I had the energy to do so. AND they had to be enjoyable… that was a non negotiable.

One of my favorite things has been doing sauna and cold plunge twice a week. It has been great for my physical heath but has also been a pillar for mental health. It’s an hour to myself where I can relax my nervous system and center my mind, which is of the utmost importance when taking care of a newborn. I chose to treat myself to a fancy sauna and cold plunge place down the street from my house, which made it easy to run over when my husband came home on his lunch break to be with our baby. I always leave feeling refreshed and energized, which has been a godsend during this time of extreme sleep deprivation from being up all night with our baby.

I’m an avid walker, and one of the hardest parts of the first 6 weeks postpartum was not being able to go for a walk. It really did affect my mental health. The second I was cleared by the doctor, I put my shoes on and hit the streets. This summer was a hot one, so I didn’t do as much walking as I would have liked, but on the mornings where the heat was bearable I’ve enjoyed a walk in the neighborhood while pushing my son in the stroller. As far as exercise goes, this is pretty much all I’ve been doing.

I’m not pushing myself too hard, and I’m not forcing my body to do anything it isn’t ready for. I’m simply moving in ways that feel good, getting outside, and letting my body recover at its own pace. And honestly, there’s something really freeing about realizing I don’t need to be doing an intense workout to feel good in my body.

I’d say the fact that I’m exclusively breastfeeding is another thing that has allowed me to reject “bounce back” culture. Breastfeeding is truly a full time job AND the most incredible bonding experience with my son. You can’t really diet or restrict calories while breastfeeding because you need to eat to keep your supply up. I couldn’t even diet if I wanted to! My appetite is alive and well, which has made it easy to focus on nourishing my body rather than restricting it. And restriction is just plain lame.

Motherhood isn’t something you recover from so you can return to who you were. It’s a transformation… and postpartum can be the perfect opportunity to build a new relationship with your body and yourself. What a gift to begin a new chapter of your story as a completely different person than who you were prior to becoming a mother. Your slate is wiped clean. Embrace it.

So what if instead of trying to bounce back after having a baby, we decided to be fully present in this new chapter of life, regardless of how challenging it may be? Let’s stop viewing postpartum as a period of time we need to hurry through and start seeing it for what it really is: a sacred transition into a completely new version of ourselves. We’ve got this.

~Reid

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P.S. I cant begin to express my gratitude for everyone that read my blog the past two weeks. Coming back to writing postpartum has taken way more energy than I expected. The sleep deprivation and “mom brain” have made it take ten times longer to write an essay that would usually take me about an hour or two in the past. So I deeply appreciate your patience as I get back to writing again at a more regular pace.💗💗💗

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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I’m baaack! And guess what… I’m a mom now!

Becoming a mother has been the biggest blessing I’ve ever known. It has been completely all encompassing, but I’m slowly starting to feel the pull to write again.

My baby is sleeping next to me in his pack ’n play because he’s outgrown his bassinet. We’re still in that sweet season of life where we’re sleeping in the same room, and it’s been really special. I can feel that season beginning to shift, though. I can feel the nursery calling, and I can feel this next chapter approaching. But I also find myself asking… Am I doing what I think I’m supposed to do, or am I listening to my maternal instinct? I’m learning to trust that instinct and not rush something simply because I think I should

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I’ve come to realize that if I want to get anything done, it’s going to have to be while he sleeps, and sleep has been almost nonexistent for us the past few weeks. I know this is all a part of having a new baby; however, I do think we will be moving him into his crib any day now. So I’ll sit here and write to you while I watch him sleep next to me and soak it all in.

I can’t believe our little guy turns 4 months old this week. He’s growing so fast, and being his mom is the biggest honor of my life. He’s such a smiley boy, and I take so much joy in watching his colorful personality come to life. I’m aware this precious time with him being so little won’t last forever, so taking time off of my other endeavors to be fully present with my son was an easy decision to make.

Before becoming a mother, I worried a lot about who I would be as a mom and whether I would “lose myself.” The idea of losing my creative fire and the time I had to pour into my career and things that were important to me really scared me. You hear so often that once you become a mom, you’re completely changed, that it becomes harder to prioritize yourself, and that your identity totally shifts. *surprise, surprise* all of these things have been proven to be true! But not in the way I had expected…

I’ve come to realize that motherhood itself is the biggest creative project I’ve ever taken on.

The everyday act of mothering is creative: being present while breastfeeding, introducing him to sounds and colors, rocking him to sleep, making sure he stays safe, simply showing up for him every day… even the monotonous things like changing diapers, cleaning up spit up, and sleep deprivation all give the long days meaning.

Being a mother is the biggest creative act, and the fact that we are taught to believe anything otherwise is deeply misguided. If you are a mother, you literally created a human being with your own body. If that isn’t creative, I don’t know what is. Pregnancy and motherhood are completely all encompassing, but they’ve also been the most validating, beautiful, and fulfilling creative experience of my life.

I’m proud of myself for putting my endeavors aside and giving everything I have to my son. I absolutely believe you can do it all as a mother. But I’m also realizing that the phrase “you can have it all, just not all at once” is so real. This is a season where being a mom needs to be my priority, and I give myself permission to fully embrace that. I’m proud of myself for recognizing that I didn’t have to rush back into everything just because I was afraid of losing momentum. You only get these first few months with your first child once and I want to experience them fully…. the beautiful moments as well as the hard ones. And I’m really proud of myself for giving myself permission to be present for all of it.

There’s a certain magic that happens when you allow yourself to simply be present.

When you let go of the pressure to be productive, create, accomplish, or do what you think you should be doing, something shifts. Giving yourself permission to fully immerse yourself in the chapter of life you’re currently in creates a kind of magic. That’s what the last four months have been like for me. I’ve been completely immersed… not just in my baby, but in this entire chapter of life with my husband and the little family we are creating. I haven’t been focused on what I’m supposed to be producing or what I’m supposed to be doing next. I’ve just been here.

About two years ago, I made a YouTube video about being nervous to become a mom before I had checked all the boxes. I felt a lot of pressure to accomplish all these things before having a baby because I was afraid I wouldn’t have time afterward. One of my viewers told me something that stuck with me: “Once you become a mom, you actually create more time for what’s important to you because you learn how to manage your time better.” I have definitely not figured this one out yet… but now that my son is almost four months old, I can see how that might eventually become true.

Right now, though, every second feels like I’m needed. I recognize how lucky I am to be home with my baby and have the opportunity to pour so much into him. I’ve chosen an approach to motherhood that feels very hands on. I’m breastfeeding, he’s still sleeping in the same room as me, and he rarely leaves my side. I love that we’ve chosen this, AND I also am excited for the day where I, too, can learn how to manage my time better and create space for what’s important to me… like being here with you!

I’m excited to be back writing. If I’m being totally honest, ever since I had my son, there were multiple times I sat down to write to you and each time it just didn’t feel right. Whether all of a sudden he needed me or the exhaustion was just too much to handle… It just didn’t feel doable. But here I am, ripping the band aid off at what feels like the perfect time for this new chapter I’m in.

So now, as I embark on the biggest creative project of my life, being a mother, I will do so with the same curiosity, intention, and openness that I’ve brought to all my creative endeavors. I’ll let this chapter shape me, teach me, and surprise me in all the ways it chooses. Thank you for being here and sharing this journey with me.

-Reid

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Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Today, we are going to muse over the art of prioritization and how we choose to spend our time. At first glance, it may seem like a simple concept…. just choose how to spend your time each day and go about your day accordingly… but we all know that sometimes that’s easier said than done.

Do you ever find yourself sitting down to complete a task but unable to fully focus on what’s in front of you because you have a million other things on your mind that you feel you should be doing instead? You go back and forth… should you continue to chisel away on what’s in front of you, even though it isn’t lighting you up in the moment, or shift gears and do something else?

This expands from our day to day allocation of time to the bigger picture of our lives… Should I be going after X in this season of life, or should I focus on Y… OR can I focus on both X and Y at the same time? Is that even possible?!?!?

I have always prided myself on my work ethic. If I really want something, it has never been a struggle to wake up each morning and get after it.. even if I don’t feel particularly inspired. Being consistent is a choice and a commitment we make to ourselves and our chosen paths. It’s a promise to keep going even when motivation fades, to show up on the days that feel ordinary and unglamorous.

But lately, I have been feeling a tug of war within myself. There are two sides of me that are begging for my attention, but I find myself unsure of how to properly allocate my time between the two and actually give each of them what they need to feel nourished.

As we get closer to the birth of our first child, my priorities have started to shift. Not intentionally, but more like a current running underneath my feet that I have no choice but to surrender to and just go with the flow

I have this urgency to create and stockpile output for all of my creative endeavors that I’ve poured my heart into over the past few years… this blog, my YouTube channel, my acting career, all of the platforms I create content on, and the endeavors I am invested in… so that once I give birth, I will still have things to put out into the world and not just disappear.

I want so badly to keep all of these creative endeavors going, but on the other hand, I feel this deep calling to nest.

We moved into our new home last June, and it still feels very far from finished when it comes to decorating and interior design… I want our home to feel welcoming and alive and not have a bunch of boxes laying around all the time. I also feel called to truly nest and get ready for our baby to arrive.

And if I look at the two sides of me… the creative artist with big dreams and then the soon to be mother who is craving a more slower inward facing pace… I cant help but feel torn between the two.

This morning in the breakfast nook, I admitted to my husband how I’ve been feeling.

“I feel like I’m getting pulled into every direction at once. To be honest I don’t know if I have the bandwidth to do both right now.” I shared with him my feelings of wanting to keep what I have going and also wanting to enjoy this time of my pregnancy before I become a mother. After all, this is a time in a woman’s life she will only experience for the first time once… I want to enjoy every minute of it and not plague myself with guilt for not being more productive in another area of my life.

And to be honest, I feel this pull to nest so strongly that by resisting it, I’m being drained of my creative instincts that usually come naturally. How can I create if I feel constantly uninspired?

He then shared with me the advice I so desperately needed. He said, “So focus everything into the house. Shake this anxiety of “I’m gonna lose momentum in my creativity and writing and videos”…. work on the house and let the great ideas come. When they do, step away from the house, give them your all, put them out into the world, finish it and feel good, then go back to the house and wait till the next one comes.”

God, how I needed to hear this.

It’s hard sometimes for me to grasp the idea that it’s okay to wait for inspiration to hit rather than show up consistently even when I don’t feel inspired.

In mulling this over I had the realization: I feel like I’ve always trusted my ability to work hard even more than my own creativity.

It’s not that I haven’t believed in my own talent, but as every creative knows, you don’t always have control over when your inspiration will hit…. one of the only things you DO have control over when it comes to workflow is your ability to stay consistent and continue to show up even when you don’t want to. So if I decide to switch things up and wait for inspiration to come… will it naturally come to me without forcing myself to make it come to me?

The truth is, all of my inspiration right now lies in my actual life. In creating our home, in growing this baby, in the excitement of becoming a mother… my inspiration is right here in front of me, and I’d be a fool to push it away for the sake of consistency in something that is not lighting me up.

My husband has a good point… my inspiration to create will probably come through doing what I naturally feel called to do in the moment. And when it does, I will give myself permission to step into it fully… but why force something that isn’t fitting right now?

Perhaps the universe is calling me to trust on a whole other level. Trust that nothing meant for me will pass me by. Trust that creativity is not something I can lose, misplace, or fall behind on. Trust that seasons exist for a reason, and honoring the one I’m in is not a betrayal of the others… it’s what allows them to flourish later.

Maybe prioritization isn’t about choosing one identity over another, but about letting each version of myself have her moment at the right time. Right now, the woman I am becoming needs softness, space, and presence. She needs to arrange drawers, wash tiny clothes, hang art on the walls, assemble dining room chairs by the fire, and sit still long enough to feel her life changing. That, too, is work. Sacred work.

And the artist in me isn’t going anywhere. She’s simply observing, collecting, living. She’s storing away details and emotions and lessons that will inevitably be poured out later… it will feel richer, deeper, more honest because I allowed myself to fully inhabit this chapter instead of multitasking my way through it.

The answer isn’t doing everything all at once. It’s allowing myself to move in waves… outward when inspiration strikes, inward when life asks me to tend to it. To stop measuring my worth by output alone and start trusting that rest, preparation, and presence are just as productive in their own quiet way.

For now, I’m choosing to follow what feels most alive. To nest. To prepare. To enjoy this fleeting, once in a lifetime season without guilt. And to trust that when it’s time to create, I won’t have to chase inspiration.. it will meet me exactly where I am, just as it always has.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Overcoming Limiting Beliefs About Money, Worth, and Success

How I’m Preparing for Motherhood as a First Time Mom (Mentally, Emotionally & Physically)

Starting Over in Your 30s (And Why It’s The Best Decade)

Become UNHINGED: This Is How You Make This Your Best Year Yet

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

Stick with me through this one… I’m going somewhere.

I’m going on night four of very little to no sleep, and the exhaustion is starting to get to me. I finally caved and cancelled pilates class since it’s probably a safety hazard to have a pregnant girl with a high likelihood of dozing off mid split operating a reformer.

I hear my husbands voice in my head saying, “it’s fine to cancel!” But still… the twelve dollar late cancelation fee and the guilt of not exercising my very pregnant body can’t help but weigh on me. In my head, I run through all the other things I could be spending twelve dollars on and immediately regret cancelling, as it feels VERY irresponsible of me… more irresponsible to throw away a couple of bucks than risk my own safety and the safety of my unborn child?…. REALLY?

I check myself and recognize the all too familiar voice in my head… my good ole lack mentality.

I swear, it’s like taking five steps forward and four steps back with this thing. Ever since my late teens, when I moved to Los Angeles, I’ve struggled with this lack mentality that I just can’t seem to shake. I do believe that being frugal at times is a good thing, but I wish I could just not obsess over the small things. I must admit, this lack mentality has gotten waaaay better over the years, as I’ve really made it a priority to overcome, but whenever it creeps back in, it’s like the flood gates have opened. First it’s the twelve dollar pilates cancellation fee, next thing I know I’m down the rabbit hole of financial planning my family’s future and all the things that could go wrong.

It got me thinking about the things we are all working through that keep popping up in our lives. Everyone has their own version of a lack mentality…. you know, that thing you’ve been trying to let go of your entire life, but it seems to keep popping up. And why do some things we try to release go away, while others continue to linger?

There have been thought patterns and mental blocks that have held me back that I have been able to finally shake and completely let go of… like my old limiting belief of feeling unloveable. God, that one plagued me for years… if you had asked me in my twenties if I thought I was lovable, I would have said “Duh!” But deep in my subconscious, I just never felt good enough.

I spent years chipping away at this limiting belief, working to reprogram it, until slowly but surely it was gone. I remember being mid walk around the Silverlake Reservoir, listening to the new Phoebe Bridgers album, when I took a pause and realized that I had recently started to relate to myself differently and therefor had begun to move through the world in a lighter way. I felt true peace and happiness within myself, and I remember the feeling of begin so proud of myself and the woman I had become. It’s not a surprise that a short two weeks later, I met my husband.

If I was able to release that feeling of being unloveable, then why in the world can I not let go of this limiting lack mentality around finances?! I always thought I would have overcome this by now…. I’m in the most stable place financially I have ever been… why does this keep popping up?

The women’s group I meet with every week is currently doing a study of the book “Consider The Lillies” which is all about letting go of anxiety by surrendering and putting our faith in God. In chapter four, the author says something along the lines of, “Your anxiety is an invitation to draw closer to God.” Interesting. This allows me to take a deep breath because, in a way, it takes the shame out of my anxiety and worry around money… knowing that this is an invitation for me to drawer closer to my higher power makes it feel like a good thing and not so shameful.

Perhaps the reason this lack mentality continues to pop up is because I still have a few more lessons to learn in the act of surrendering it? Every time we attempt to loosen our grip, we grow closer to our higher selves… we string the moments of peace together until the feeling is no longer fleeting but ever present. It’s like with grief… every time we stop running from it and instead allow ourselves to fully feel it, we soften it’s sharp edges just a little more.

What if this lack mentality is an old protector that just doesn’t know it can rest yet?Acknowledging how it once kept me safe from going broke, but it has now served its purpose, allows me to meet it with compassion instead of frustration. Gently reminding it that I am no longer in survival mode and that my circumstances have changed.

Maybe this fear isn’t proof that I haven’t healed… it’s proof that I care. And I really do care… a lot. I care a lot about becoming a good mother. I care a lot about being a good friend. I care a lot about leaving a positive mark on this world and the people I interact with. I care a lot about building a life that feels safe, abundant, and rooted in love… not just for me, but for my family. And maybe this fear is simply the shadow side of that care, the part of me that wants to protect what matters most. If that’s true, then there’s nothing wrong with me for feeling it. It just means I’m human, deeply invested, and learning how to hold my hopes with trust instead of tension.

Everyone has their own version of a lack mentality that keeps popping up throughout their life… yours could be related to time, love, youth, success. Our limiting beliefs that we thought we had already overcome tend to return when we are going through a time of transition. When they resurface, that doesn’t mean we have failed.

Maybe the things that return aren’t setbacks. Perhaps they’re checkpoints asking us if we’re ready to choose trust again. And choosing trust again doesn’t have to look like some grand declaration or perfectly calm nervous system. Sometimes it looks small and ordinary. It looks like canceling Pilates, paying the twelve dollars, taking a nap, and letting yourself be taken care of… by your body, by your partner, by God, by life itself.

I don’t think healing is a straight line. I think it’s cyclical. We revisit the same lessons at different stages of life, each time with a little more wisdom, a little more softness.

And maybe the lack mentality returning isn’t to suck me back in… but to show me how far I’ve come. It might just be the biggest gift I’ve been given all day.

And maybe the goal was never to completely eradicate fear or lack, but to learn how to meet them without abandoning ourselves in the process.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

How I’m Preparing for Motherhood as a First Time Mom (Mentally, Emotionally & Physically)

Starting Over in Your 30s (And Why It’s The Best Decade)

Become UNHINGED: This Is How You Make This Your Best Year Yet

Create More in 2026 With This One Mindset Shift

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I’ve been saying “Once it’s January, THEN I’ll start getting ready for the baby.” Perhaps I needed that time to wrap my head around all we have to do to prepare… for giving birth, for taking care of our baby, for becoming parents… but also to accept the fact that my life is about to change forever. It feels inevitable that the old Reid will be gone, and I feel a sadness with the possibility of letting go of her.

Perhaps delaying working on my registry and the nursery was my own way of giving myself space to process and mentally prepare myself for such a big change. I wanted this pregnancy with my whole heart, but that doesn’t mean I can’t feel a bit emotional about letting go of my old life. I feel like there is something to be said for the emotional rollercoaster that naturally occurs when you are about to become a mom for the first time… wondering if you’ve accomplished all you could up until this point, replaying scenarios of your past, wondering if you would have been more successful if you had only done things differently, dealing with all the “what if’s.” I’d be lying if If I didn’t say I felt a bit guilty for feeling this way, but I do believe that reflection on our past and the excitement of becoming a mom can both exist at the same time.

For a while, I was focused on how to not “lose myself” in motherhood… but now I know that there is no way around it. I will inevitably become a different person. But instead of focusing on what I’m losing, I am now in awe of how much I will gain. The idea that motherhood will mold and shape me in ways that I cannot predict, even if I tried, is invigorating. I’m not only getting ready to meet my baby, but preparing to meet a future version of myself.

There is excitement in the unknown, and accepting that there is only so much we can do as women who are about to become mothers to prepare ourselves is freeing. I don’t think you can ever be truly, fully prepared to become a mom. I imagine it to be something you just get the hang of as you go. It’s like driving a car… for years you wonder what it will be like to get behind the wheel, and after reading a manual and taking a class about drivers safety, you realize nothing truly prepares you for driving more than actually getting in the driver’s seat and putting your foot on the gas. It’s something you just rise to the occasion of in the moment. Obviously, becoming a mother is way more complex than driving a car… but you know what I mean.

For me, what’s been helpful is allowing myself to follow my curiosity. When I found out I was pregnant, I immediately felt like I had to order every book on pregnancy, decide my birth plan, and sign up for all the classes… but I quickly realized that the best way for me to move forward was to allow my curiosity to lead the way. I began to pick up only the books on birth that interested me, I signed my husband and I up for the classes that aligned with our birth plan, I waited to order things for the nursery until I felt inspired to get started. When we stay curious and honor our intuition, we are always lead to the most magical places.

Not forcing myself to make pregnancy or motherhood look like what I thought it should look like, and instead allowing my natural urges to take the lead and trusting my instincts, has been the biggest gift to myself. Motherhood is a world full of differing opinions, and it can be easy to fall into the trap of listening to what everyone else thinks you should do. A lot of well meaning people are super passionate that their way is the right and only way to do it. It can feel extremely overwhelming hearing all of these differing opinions on how to do things as a mom… which stroller to get, to breastfeed or not to breastfeed, and everyone is going to have an opinion on your birth plan… but one thing I’m realizing is that the only person who is going to know whats best for you and your baby is you.

Giving myself permission to trust myself, and trust that I will know whats best for me and our baby, has taken so much of the pressure off my shoulders and put the fun back into preparing to become a mom. As we get closer to our due date, I am finding that everything is just falling into place. The nursery is coming together, I feel confident in all the birth preparation I’ve been doing, and I am finally embracing this new version of me that is emerging.

Learning to embrace the uncertainty rather than run from it has softened me in the best way. It’s allowed me to stay present instead of trying to fast forward through this season or control every possible outcome. I’m realizing that this liminal space… the in between of who I’ve been and who I’m becoming is not something to rush through, but something to honor.

The old Reid isn’t disappearing; she’s evolving. Every dream, every lesson, every version of myself that came before this moment has led me here and will walk with me into motherhood. I don’t have to mourn her to make room for who I’m becoming. She’s the foundation. And now, something new is being built on top of it.

I don’t need to have it all figured out. I just need to stay open, curious, and willing to meet each moment as it comes. Motherhood isn’t asking me to be someone else… it’s inviting me to become more of who I already am. And that feels like the most beautiful beginning of all.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Starting Over in Your 30s (And Why It’s The Best Decade)

Become UNHINGED: This Is How You Make This Your Best Year Yet

Create More in 2026 With This One Mindset Shift

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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My new year’s resolution this year is to be more unhinged.

Not in a crazy, go-off-the rails, “she’s lost her mind” type of way. To me, becoming more unhinged has a whole other meaning, and it’s one that has the ability to set you free.

MY DEFINITION OF UNHINGED: Becoming unhinged means detaching from the idea of perfection we all thought we had to abide by. It means deviating from our well made plans and going a more risky, adventurous route. It’s all about showing up as your full, authentic self and ditching the need to be palatable, polished, or universally approved of. It’s trusting your instincts over the rules, choosing curiosity over control, and letting yourself be seen exactly as you are… messy, bold, evolving.

Being unhinged is giving yourself permission to change your mind, take up space, say the thing, wear the outfit, make the move, and stop waiting for the “right” time or the green light from anyone else. It’s living from truth instead of fear, and realizing that the life you want is on the other side of loosening your grip.

Whew! Glad I got all that out. Doesn’t that sound nice?

I am someone who LOVES to make plans. At the beginning of every year, I get so excited to sit down and write out all my goals for the coming year and make a plan for how I’m going to achieve them. But I’ve noticed over the years that the only times I’ve actually manifested what I want were when I allowed myself to deviate from the plan. Only when I surrendered and just went with the flow more and trusted my gut in the moment, rather than trying to make the “right” decision… that’s when things came through.

I am challenging you to get a little radical this year. Becoming unhinged begins with your commitment to being unpredictable. Lean into the element of surprise in your life. Let your plans get messy. Be okay with your life not going according to plan, and then STILL showing up from that space.

When I say become unhinged, I don’t mean reckless.

I mean: Saying the thing you’ve been scared to say. Posting the video you keep overthinking and letting it be a little all over the place. Going after the opportunity before you feel ready. Letting people misunderstand you. Choosing growth over approval.

Being unhinged is deciding that your potential matters more than being liked.

In order to be unhinged, you have to first trust yourself. It can feel scary because, in essence, you are showing up in the world as the most authentic version of yourself, which can feel extremely vulnerable.

The best way I get past this is: If someone doesn’t like me as the most authentic version of myself, then why would I want them to like me if I’m trying to play the part of perfect?

Once you re-prioritize how you want to be valued, it gets a lot easier to find the courage to be unhinged. You start showing up in ways that feel more grounded in your authenticity. And before you know it, people start resonating with you more often because of this.

The shift that everyone is sensing but no one is really talking about is that people are craving more real, raw, and honest interactions… not just in the content they consume, but in their day to day life. No one is attracted to perfection anymore.

We all practically live on our phones anyway, so when we actually come across someone who is fully present, imperfect, and unapologetically themselves, it feels refreshing. It feels human. It feels safe. In a world curated by filters, captions, and carefully constructed identities, authenticity stands out. People aren’t looking to be impressed anymore… they’re looking to feel something. They’re drawn to honesty, to vulnerability, to the courage it takes to show up without a mask. And that’s where being “unhinged” becomes your superpower: it gives others permission to drop the act too.

At the end of the day, being unhinged isn’t about rebelling for the sake of it… it’s about coming home to yourself. It’s about releasing the version of you that was shaped by expectations, timelines, and quiet self-betrayals, and choosing the one that feels alive, curious, and honest. The more you loosen your grip on how you’re perceived, the more magnetic you become. Not because you’re trying to be, but because you’re finally real.

So maybe this year isn’t about becoming more disciplined, more polished, or more “put together.” Maybe it’s about becoming more you. Letting your life unfold in ways that don’t always make sense on paper but feel right in your body. If that’s unhinged, then so be it.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Create More in 2026 With This One Mindset Shift

20 Questions to Design Your Dream Life

How to Stop Talking Yourself Out of the Life You Want

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Congratulations y’all… we made it! It is officially the week between Christmas and the New Year. This is one of my favorite weeks of the year because it is the perfect time to take stock of the past year, dream up what we’d like the coming year to look like, and MANIFEST!

The whirlwind of the holidays is slowing down, and after some much enjoyed holiday cheer, we are all taking a deep breath while plopping ourselves down on the couch to finally relax. The pressure of the year is over, the expectations of the new year haven’t started yet, no one knows what day it is, and your nervous system can finally relax.

It’s the perfect “in between” time to get curious about the person you’d like to be and create your vision for the year to come. I have come to realize that I do my best manifesting from a relaxed state, where I’m not feeling stressed or pressured to “make something happen asap.”

Fully unplugging from the hustle and bustle of life really allows me to think big and not put limits on myself.

I love using this time to check in with how I want my life to feel in the coming year. Not just what I want to accomplish, but how I want to move through my days. Confident. Inspired. Supported. When I focus on the feeling first, the vision tends to organize itself naturally.

There are many ways you can create your vision for the new year… you can vision board, write a list of everything you’d like to accomplish, watch inspiring YouTube videos to get ideas, just lay around and daydream. Do whatever ritual you feel called to do. Just choose one that lights you up with inspiration and gets you excited for whats next.

What if this was the week where you reconnected with yourself… your intuition, your desires, and the most authentic version of you?

Here are some questions to ask yourself before the new year that will help you get clear on your vision for the new year ahead and the person you’d like to become:

1. What would make this year feel deeply successful to me, even if no one else understood it?

2. What does my intuition keep nudging me toward that I’ve been ignoring?

3. What are three words that describe how I want to feel this year?

4. What would change if I trusted myself fully this year?

5. What am I ready to receive without overworking for?

6. What part of myself can I trust the most and rely on moving into this new season? (Example: I can trust my ability to be consistent with whatever I’m pursuing.)

7. Who are the top five people I want to spend the most time with this year?

8. What habits can I let go of that no longer serve me?

9. What is one area of my life that I’d like to put the majority of my focus on? (Career, relationship, health and fitness, finances, etc…)

10. What have I been pursuing that no longer feels aligned?

11. What are my top 3 goals for the year?

12. Where do I want to visit?

13. Write what a day in the life looks like…. This can be as long as you want! Journal every detail of your dream day.

14. Act as if you are a close friend of yours… write down how you made you feel this year?

15. If I could have any dream come true this year, what would it be? Think BIG!

16. How do I want to reinvent myself? (Example: I’ve always wanted to cut my hair short but always been too nervous.)

17. Who can I ask for help to help me reach my goals this year?

    What parts of myself would I like to get back in touch with?

18. How can I make better use of my time this year?

19. What areas of life have been depleting me?

20. What is one habit I’d like to implement and be consistent with throughout the year?

If anything, try to answer these questions this week. Don’t overthink the answers, just let your first thought be the right answer. I hope you have a nourishing week of relaxation and dreaming up the life of your wildest dreams.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

How to Stop Talking Yourself Out of the Life You Want

SECOND TRIMESTER RECAP | weight gain, body changes, anatomy scan, etc.

You want to level up? Let go of the person you used to be

10 Things to Let Go of Before 2026 (So You Can Manifest More)

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Call me crazy, but I believe we were all put on this earth with the capacity to experience our deepest desires. The whole “if you can dream it, you can be it” phrase isn’t just a motivational quote… it’s the truth so many of us are too afraid to believe.

You already know what you want. In fact, you’ve probably known for a while. But every time you get close to making the changes you are called to make, that voice creeps in, justifying why you should stay small…

“Who do you think you are?”

“You are safer in the place you are now… that would be way too dangerous.”

“Good things like that only happen for people who are prettier, luckier, wealthier than me.”

So you listen. It’s easier to listen. You tell yourself you are being patient, logical, and the ever so popular… realistic. The voice convinces you it’s just not the right time, or that you need to figure out a few more things first. But deep down you know the truth. It’s not timing… it’s fear.

Fear of being seen. Fear of failing. Fear of being alone. Fear of finding out you actually can do it, and the effort it will take to live up to the new bar you’ve set for yourself everyday.

And I get it… the word “fear” is super loaded… it’s like “I’m not living in fear!”

But when fear shows up repeatedly in our daily life, it usually presents itself in the quiet excuses and stories we tell ourselves. So you can see why fear can be suuuuuper sneaky.

But nine times out of ten, fear almost always means you’re standing at the edge of something important.

This is more than just a pitch for why you should “follow your dreams”… we are going deeper than that. This is the call for you to stop settling. It’s a blueprint for how you are going to get clear on what you really want in life and how you are going to find the confidence to take it.

By the end of today’s post you will have let go of the excuses as to why you should stay in the situations and dynamics you’ve outgrown and have a clear idea of the next right action to take. How exciting!!

Curiosity Is Your Superpower

Have you ever been curious about where a certain path would lead you in life? Constantly wondering what your life would be like if you made that career pivot, or left that relationship you’ve outgrown? Your curiosity isn’t there to torment you and have you live in the land of “what if.” It’s there to show you what is possible.

When your intuition nudges you to go in a certain direction… listen. Don’t ignore the inner voice inside that’s telling you there’s more out there for you to experience. Allow your curiosity to guide you. You are meant to try new things and step out of your comfort zone. Thats how we grow!

Allow your curiosity to be your superpower. Curl up on the sofa with your notebook and a warm cup of tea… now write down all of the intuitive hits you are getting. Where is your curiosity leading you? What are you interested in experiencing next? Once you write it down, it becomes harder to avoid.

Dreams Aren’t Random… They’re Directional

The dreams you have aren’t random. They’re not whimsical fantasies or “nice ideas.” They’re directions. They’re little internal compasses pointing you toward the life you’re meant to explore.

I, for one, practically came out of the womb with the big dream of becoming an actress. My entire life, until very recently, was completely devoted to actualizing that dream, and nothing came before it. I know on a very visceral level what its like to have a dream completely run your life… and I also know what its like to have that dream lead you to many other experiences and opportunities that I never thought in a million years I’d be presented with.

Although I have built a solid body of work as an actor and achieved many heights in my career, I still have not reached that true level of success that “little Reid” had always dreamed of. HOWEVER, it’s all good, you know why? Because by actually pursuing my dream, I have ended up exactly where I need to be as the happiest, most authentic version of myself. I truly do not think I would have the life I have now or be the person I am so proud to have become had I not pursued my dream in the first place.

Some might say, “Well, what’s the point of pursuing a goal if you don’t fully reach it” … and I completely disagree. Anytime you have a hunch to go for something, it is leading you in the direction you are meant to go in. The key is to enjoy the journey along the way

.

The Universe Responds to Movement

(MOVEMENT = MOMENTUM)

Unsure about what first step to take? No worries! The universe responds to even the smallest movement. It can be as small as reaching out to someone who has done the thing you desire to do or watching YouTube videos on the topic. The universe is looking for you to meet it halfway so it can give you the next right step to take.

Momentum is created the moment you choose action over overthinking. When you move, clarity follows. When you wait for clarity first, you often stay stuck. Every small step is a signal. It tells the universe, I’m serious. I’m ready. I trust this enough to begin. And once that signal is sent, opportunities, ideas, and connections start to appear in ways you couldn’t have planned.

The mistake we make is thinking the first step has to be big, bold, or perfect. It doesn’t. It just has to be honest. Consistent movement compounds. One action leads to another, and suddenly you’re no longer standing at the starting line… you’re in motion.

So don’t wait for certainty. Take the step that’s available now.

Fear Isn’t The Enemy… Misinterpreting it is

Once you decide what you are wanting to pursue next, it’s likely you might have a bit of fear come up. But fear isn’t just normal… it’s expected. Whenever you are taking a leap of faith or pursuing something new, you are definitely going to have a bit of fear come up. And a lot of time we let our fear talk us out of doing what we had hoped to do in the first place.

It is important that you don’t let fear become your enemy. Instead, befriend it. Get curious about why your fear is coming up. Unpack it to get to the root of the issue, and you will usually find its just the younger version of yourself reacting to something it doesn’t yet understand.

Fear is often just your nervous system trying to keep you safe based on old experiences, past disappointments, or stories you once internalized about what was “possible” for you. It’s not a warning sign that you’re doing something wrong… it’s a signal that you’re stepping outside what’s familiar.

Read more

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Are you allowing yourself to be truly happy in your life?

A few weeks ago was my birthday, and I found myself feeling oddly happy and content this year. Birthdays have notoriously been a time where I jump at the chance to reassess how I’m living and all the changes I could make in my life. It was almost like I felt inspired by all the ways I could change than proud of the person I had become.

As I sifted through my old journals, a birthday tradition I have always held dear, a few things became apparent to me. The first being how much I’ve grown over my life as a whole, and especially the past few years. The next was how addicted to the chase I have been for most of my life. Throughout the pages, there seemed the be the trend of this urgent need to make something of myself and never feeling quite whole until I reached some imaginary finish line.

I used to believe that in order to reach my goals, I had to live in a constant state of wanting more… that if I ever let myself feel fully happy with my life, dare I say content, it would somehow kill every morsel of ambition in me. It was almost a romanticization of the constant pursuit of perfection and wanting more, which only led to the feeling of never being good enough. As if my life would not mean anything unless I achieved some great level of success.

Yet here I am, a changed woman. Not because something dramatic happened, but because I finally realized that the point was never to outrun myself. The point was to meet myself. To actually look at the life I’ve built… the love, the peace, the small daily joys… and allow them to be enough. To let myself exhale.

And what surprised me most is that happiness didn’t make me lazy. It didn’t make me complacent. If anything, it made me more grounded, more creative, more clear about what I want and why I want it. Because when you’re not operating from fear, or lack, or the pressure to prove something… your ambition becomes cleaner. Softer. More honest.

That’s the part nobody talks about: Loving your life doesn’t shrink your potential… it expands it.

It expands your mind to dream from a place of abundance rather than survival. It allows you to actually enjoy your life while you are working towards your goals and that good feeling only attracts more opportunities. And maybe that’s the real marker of growth… not how much you accomplish, but how fully you allow yourself to be here, now, in a life you once prayed for.

I’m just so much happier now than when I was living in a state of constant pursuit. I’m still putting in the work and striving forward, but I’m actually able to enjoy the process. I wish I could go back and tell my younger self that there is another way… a way that is much easier and lighter than what she was doing. Not that she would have listened… sometimes we have to just go through the experience and learn the lessons ourselves.

So wherever you are on the journey when you read this, ask yourself… am I allowing myself to be happy? Am I blocking my joy because I feel undeserving? Where can I release impossible expectations on myself and allow more grace and ease?

You have come so far. It’s important to celebrate yourself, exactly where you are.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

10 Things to Let Go of Before 2026 (So You Can Manifest More)

The Rise of the Multi-Hyphenate Woman: Create The Life You Want

The Real First Trimester of Pregnancy: Everything No One Tells You

Redefining Success & Embracing Change | The Pressure to Succeed Before Becoming a Mom

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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Well, it is finally December and 2025 is coming to an end. With the new year upon us, thoughts of goal setting and what you’d like to achieve in 2026 are most likely starting to stir up in your mind. I’m sure you have your preferred modality for drumming up the life you want… whether it’s a vision board, creating a full life blueprint, or just a simple list scribbled in your notes app… whatever makes you feel the most inspired to take action, this is your time to do it!

But In order to level up and create the life you want, the first thing you must do is get rid of everything that is blocking you. Which is annoying, because its like “I want what I want, and I want it now.” But the truth is, in order to create the life you desire, you must first let go of your old one.

December is the perfect time to pause and realign. So many of us walk into a new year with the same habits, fears, and beliefs that kept us stuck the year before. How could your life possibly fit all the newness you’ve been praying for if you are still giving your energy to the old ways of being you’ve outgrown?

Before we can manifest what we want into our lives, we must first create space for our manifestations to come through by letting go of the thoughts, beliefs, and patterns that we have outgrown. And that’s exactly what we are going to do today. Below are my top 10 things to let go of by the end of 2025, so that you enter the new year feeling clear, focused, and ready for your best year year.

10 Things To Let Go Of Before The End of The Year

1. Old Desires You’ve Outgrown

If you are doing life right, you are going to be changing a lot. The one thing on this journey that is for certain is change, which means you are going to want different things at different times. But what happens when our new desires conflict with our old desires? In order to help explain the idea of letting go of old desires you’ve outgrown, I’ll use the example of my life in LA and my acting career.

My entire childhood I dreamed of becoming a professional actress. At 18 I moved to Los Angeles and turned that dream into a reality. Everything I did was in pursuit of making my dreams come true. When I wasn’t in on set I was auditioning, when I wasn’t auditioning I was in acting class, when I wasn’t in acting class I was reading books on the craft and doing everything I could to network with people in the industry. My entire life was acting and I loved every minute of it.

Then, when I turned 30, I met my husband. Truly, by that point I was craving change. I was in the process of plotting my move to New York City and Los Angeles just felt kind of blah to me after living there for 13 years. Next thing I knew my life was completely turned upside down! I now live in South Carolina, I’m a homeowner, I’m married and about to become a first time mom, and I have found more ways to express myself and lean into my creativity by sharing my writing on Substack and creating videos on Youtube.

I’m still an actress and that will always be a part of my life, but I have found that I want other things too now. I don’t think I would have started creating content online had I stayed in Los Angeles, nor do I think I would be married and pregnant. My life there was not aligned with the new life and identity I wanted for myself. And if I’m being honest, I felt like I outgrew the city and my life there. All of a sudden what I used to want so desperately five years ago now seemed boring to me.

So get real with yourself…. Do you actually still want the things you’ve been striving for? Because in order to get what you actually want in present day, you can’t be trying to fit yourself into a box that you’ve outgrown. You’re not obligated to keep wanting what past-you wanted. And I know how hard it can be to let go of a dream or shift in a new direction… That doesn’t mean you’re a failure, it means you’ve accomplished everything you were meant to achieve and learn in that endeavor.

This isn’t to say you have to completely give up on what you have been pursuing; its more so a call to get honest with yourself about what you ACTUALLY want in life and what you should prioritize moving forward

2. Settling For Less Than What You Deserve

You know what you want, you know what you DESERVE in life, and yet you still settle for less.

If you know you are in a relationship you’ve outgrown or a job you are overqualified for… why not ask for more? Why not go after what you know you are meant to experience in this life?

I see this happen a lot with people who stay in relationships they know aren’t right for them… possibly because they are afraid they won’t find anyone better, which is SO sad because I personally believe there is someone out there for everyone. Leaving might mean you will be single at a quite inconvenient time in life, but wouldn’t you rather have a brief period of inconvenience than to miss out on the love of your freakin life?

This is a pretty simple concept. You don’t really need to pause and think about it… you just know. What are you settling for in your life right now? Where in your day to day life do you often pause and think “I am meant for more?” If you aren’t ready to jump off the cliff, get curious about the person you could be if you decided to settling for less than you deserve.

3. Unrealistic Body Expectations

Pregnancy has humbled me with this one, y’all. As someone who cared way too deeply about how they looked physically for the majority of their existence, finding myself in a place where I must let go of any expectations I have for my body has been wild yet freeing. Looking back on the seasons of my life where my unrealistic body expectations were the center of my universe, I now see how much that held me back.

I struggled with really bad eating disorders in my late teens and early twenties, but have been so lucky to be free from that for a while. I’d say I care how I look, but I don’t obsess over it.

If you are obsessing over attaining the perfect body and doing whatever you have to do to get it, I promise you there is so much more to life. The goal should be to nourish your body with whole foods and enjoy movement… not to torture yourself to look a certain way.

Every morning when your feet hit the floor, thank your body for everything it helps you do. Be kind to yourself and watch how much energy you free up when you let go of the negative self talk and unrealistic body expectations that you might not be aware are holding you back.

4. The Timeline You Thought You “Should” Be On

You are exactly where you need to be. Everything that has happened to you in your life has led you to this moment. If the slightest thing had gone different, then you wouldn’t be you! And what a shame that would be.

It is easy to fall into the trap (especially around the year when we are all reflecting on our lives) of feeling like we are behind in life. Usually we feel this way when we compare ourselves and our lives to the lives of other people. It’s hard not to… I get it. I was single all of my twenties and always found it hard to not compare my path to the paths of my friends who all had boyfriends. I couldn’t help but feel like I was behind. I dated a lot but never seemed to find the right person. I began to fear that no one would want to date me when they found out I had never had a real relationship… If my past self only knew the amazing life I’d have now!

And here I am! Married to the love of my life. It all worked out, and if I had only trusted that it would work out all along, then I probably would have saved myself a lot of sleepless nights. Try your best to not compare your life to others. You probably have a life that so many other people dream of having… don’t take it for granted.

5. The Fear of Life Being Really, Really Good For You

Sometimes we hold ourselves back because we are afraid of how good life could get. Think about that.

6. Constantly Checking Your Phone

Who doesn’t struggle with this? I think we can all agree that we could check our phone a little (or a lot) less. Think about how much time you are wasting a day by just scrolling on the apps and what you could actually do if you freed up all of that time?

I’m in a season of getting really real with myself on how I spend my time. I give birth in four and a half months and I am well aware that my time will no longer be entirely my own. In an attempt to lesson that shock, I am working on being more efficient with my time now, so that I am not shocked by how little time I have to myself once I have my baby to tend to. And the most obvious thing I can do is STOP SCROLLING ON THE PHONE.

I’ve been doing this by creating certain time blocks called “phone time” which are usually scheduled around if I am posting anything online that day. So tomorrow when I post this Substack, I will give myself 30 minutes of phone time after. That doesn’t mean I have to spend the entire time scrolling, but if I want to look at something on my phone, I’m allowed to during that time.

If you don’t have a problem with constantly checking your phone, what is that one thing you find yourself wasting time doing, and how can you minimize it?

7. Feeling Like You Have To Earn Rest And Relaxation

You are worthy and deserving of rest. It is your birthright to sprawl out on the bed with a good book and escape into another world while also relaxing your nervous system. It is not just an option; it is a much needed practice that we all (especially us women) need in order to show up as our best selves in the world.

As a former hustle culture girlie, I used to deprive myself of rest and relaxation because I felt I had to earn it. Boy was I wrong. Ever since I have adopted the mindset of “I am worthy of rest and relaxation,” my productivity has actually soared because I no longer feel depleted all the time.

When you allow yourself to rest, you lean into receiving mode. As a matter of fact, I feel like my best manifesting has occurred when I’ve allowed myself to relax because I’m no longer trying to force or control what I want. So as you enter 2026 remember: you don’t have to earn the right to rest… its your birthright.

8. Negative Self Talk

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Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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“Oh gosh, tomorrow is my birthday,” I thought to myself as I rolled back into bed after turning off my alarm clock this morning. Usually I am dwelling about my birthday up to weeks prior… not necessarily making plans, but more so contemplating what I want the next year of my life to be like and how I’d like to change. I’ve always loved a good life reset, and birthdays always seem to be the most obvious and intentional time to reinvent your life and give something new a go. But this year I haven’t given it much thought just yet… how off-brand of me.

My cat then crawled into her rightful place on my chest and proceeded to give me my morning bath by licking my face, as she does every morning. Warmth immediately filled my heart as it always does when she showers me with affection, but this time is felt different, more intense. The realization that I am truly happy and content is a feeling I feared for the longest time, as I thought it meant I would no longer have the desire to strive for more. But here we are… it would be a shame to push it away.

Is the reason I hadn’t given my birthday much thought this year because I’m actually happy with my life? Yes, I have things I am striving for and working on, but I do realize now that I don’t have to suffer in the process… I can be happy and fulfilled in the climb. Perhaps this whole time I was so obsessed with the fresh start of a birthday because I was hoping to really get something out of it, a missing piece that would finally make me feel grounded. A sense of arrival, maybe.

But this morning, with a purring cat pressed against my heart and the soft light creeping through the blinds, I realized I don’t feel like I’m missing anything right now. I’m not waiting for a new age to fix me or a ritual to reset me. I’m simply here, in a life I genuinely like, moving toward a future I’m excited about. And maybe that’s the quiet gift of this birthday… the understanding that I don’t need a reinvention to feel new. I already do.

As I pressed “start” on the coffee machine and made my way to a pile of yesterday’s mail, I began sifting through to see if there was anything important. A card with my grandmother’s writing caught my eye. I ripped open the envelope and there was a card with a picture of a fabulous looking woman lounging on the beach and a quote that read, “I AM GOING TO MAKE EVERYTHING AROUND ME BEAUTIFUL AND THAT WILL BE MY LIFE. - Elsie de Wolfe” This struck a chord in me.

After reading my sweet grandmothers birthday card, I immediately grabbed my phone and googled who Elsie de Wolfe was. I was so moved by her quote, I just had to know who this woman was. As I sipped my coffee I enjoyed reading a few different articles about her and was blown away by her life. She was mostly known for her interior design work in the early 1900s New York City, but what fascinated me most was how many things she pursued in life…

She started off as an actress and caught people’s eyes for her fashion sense, which lead to her being known as somewhat of a fashion icon. It wasn’t until the age of 40 that she started her interior design business and age 70 that she was named Best Dressed Woman in the World. The blog Interiors & Icons referred to her this way: “She had many talents under her belt - she was the fashion icon, the actress, the Red Cross nurse, the original interior designer, the hostess with the mostess, and most importantly a free, independent soul who dedicated herself to creating beauty.”

I mean, wow. What an incredible woman whose legacy still lives on, not for just one thing, but for the entire spectrum of who she was.

As a soon-to-be mom in the thick of some major life changes, at times I have felt like my future was being written for me, not by me. I’ve had to compromise, shift, and make quick game time decisions while not knowing if they were the right move. I’d be lying if i said I wasn’t nervous about the unknowns that are present in my life.

But If we are doing life right, we are constantly transforming and allowing ourselves to stretch and try new things. For most of my life, I was so set on being just one thing, and the more I tried to be it, the more tired and unsatisfied I felt. It wasn’t until about three years ago when I finally allowed myself to pursue interests other than just acting that I fully realized a well rounded life was possible for me. Letting go of the idea that I had to be the best at just one thing and embracing the multi-hyphenate lifestyle has been, not an easy, but an expansive one.

When I read that Elsie de Wolfe quote this morning, it was like,

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Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

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We’ve been taught to measure success in milestones… buying the dream house, landing that big job you’ve strived so many years for, hitting X amount of followers, being able to afford the newest, hottest hand bag….

While I do agree setting goals like these is a great tool to get us where we want to go and provides us something to aim for, if we place our value in whether or not we have accomplished all of our lofty goals, that is a recipe for an unfulfilled life.

With just two months left of this year, we can all feel the pull to look back and assess how successful we are by how many goals we’ve achieved. I am the first one to admit that I loooooove to goal set, and I loooooove to look back and see what I’ve checked off the list. It gives me such a sense of momentum and pride. But lately, I’ve been asking myself a harder question:

What if success isn’t about how much I’ve achieved, but about how I’ve lived while working toward it?

What if I measured my level of success not by which goals I’ve met, but by the level of change and transformation I have experienced?

Because if the entire year becomes one big chase for the next milestone, we miss out on the very moments that make the journey meaningful.

I don’t know about y’all, but some of the toughest most challenging years of my life… I’m talking about the years where I have dropped to my knees and begged God for help on multiple occasions… those are the years I look back and realize I was, in fact, the most successful. Because those were the years that stretched me. The years that forced me to grow, to surrender, to rebuild. The years that humbled me enough to see what really matters and made me strong enough to go after it.

Success isn’t always shiny. Sometimes it looks like keeping the faith when nothing’s working out the way you planned. Sometimes it’s showing up when you’d rather hide. Sometimes it’s trusting that the version of you being formed in the struggle will be the one who can handle everything you’ve been asking for.

This past year has been one of the best years of my life. There has been so much joy and newness… I got married to the love of my life, moved across the country, we bought our first home together, now we are expecting our first child… I am having one of those milestone years. HOWEVER, I don’t believe I would be having this year had I not experienced those challenging seasons that came before it. Because it was in the moments that nearly broke me that I was being shaped into the woman I am today… one who can not only receive the blessings but also hold the weight of the responsibility that comes along with them.

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So as this year comes to an end, I’m reminding myself that the point isn’t to arrive… it’s to evolve. To keep becoming. To live fully in the process, not just in the reward. Redefining success isn’t about lowering the bar… it’s about raising our awareness. It’s about realizing that becoming the person who can handle the dream is just as important as achieving it.

Because maybe success isn’t about the dream house or the big job or the perfect number in the bank account. Maybe success is knowing that through it all, you didn’t give up on yourself.

As we step into these final weeks of the year, maybe the best thing we can do is pause and ask ourselves: How have I changed? How have I grown? What have I learned about myself in the process?

Growth doesn’t always announce itself in big wins… sometimes it’s quiet, subtle, and happening beneath the surface. But that’s where the real transformation begins.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Redefining Success & Embracing Change | The Pressure to Succeed Before Becoming a Mom

We’re Pregnant! Becoming a First Time Mom at 33

You’re Not Supposed to Be Good at It Yet | Start Before You’re Ready!

How to Finish the Year Strong | The 12 Week Year Method

Change Your Self Concept, Change Your Life

✨favorite things this week✨

This week, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite things I’ve been using during my pregnancy so far…

• Inito Fertility Tracker - If you’re not pregnant yet but hoping to be soon, I can’t recommend tracking your cycle enough. Learning how your body works… your ovulation window, hormonal shifts, and natural rhythm… can make the process of trying to conceive so much more empowering and less stressful. I personally loved using a fertility tracker because it helped me better understand my body’s signals and know exactly when I was most fertile. It took out so much of the guesswork and made me feel more connected to my body in the process. Whether you’re trying to conceive or simply want to get to know your body better, tracking your cycle is such a beautiful act of self-awareness and care.

• Perelel Health - I have been taking Perelel Health’s vitaminsever since trying to conceive. Their trimester-specific packs take the guesswork out of what your body needs, so you aren’t just taking a prenatal but a packet of everything your body needs at that specific time. I have also really enjoyed their cellular hydration powder as well as their Synbiotic Greens Powder since I at times struggle to get all of my nutrients in. Perelel has also been kind to give us a discount code… use code REIDCOX15 for 15% off your first order!

• HATCH Belly Oil - Love this belly oil! It isn’t oily and absorbs quickly. This is the only belly oil I’ve used so far but I really love the feel and clean ingredients. The bottle last’s a long time too! I’ll definitely be using it after my pregnancy as just a daily body moisturizer.

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

My husband and I recently announced that we are expecting our first child, a long awaited dream of ours that is finally coming to fruition. The excitement has set in as we start to make plans and prepare our home for the arrival of our child, yet behind the scenes there are so many changes occurring. Not only has my body already transformed so much at just 15 weeks, but my emotions, routines, and even my sense of identity are shifting too. It’s a beautiful, overwhelming, and deeply transformative season… one where I’m learning to surrender control, trust the process, and make space for the new chapter that’s unfolding.

Which has me thinking… I always knew that pregnancy and the process of growing a child was going to be something no one could fully prepare me for, as if it was an initiation that no one could possibly begin to understand until they had experienced it themselves… but I had no idea how life altering it would be from the second I found out I was pregnant. Specifically how challenging the first trimester was.

For some reason, I was completely unaware of what the first trimester was really all about. Yes, I had heard of the infamous “morning sickness” and I knew that it was a time we might want to keep to ourselves, but I had no idea how challenging this period of time would be. “Surely the third trimester would be the hardest!” I had always thought, being the tail end of pregnancy when my stomach would be as big as a watermelon. But in reality, the first trimester launched me into pregnancy in a way I wasn’t prepared for… complete exhaustion, unpredictable waves of nausea, and emotions that seemed to shift by the hour. It was as if my body and mind were being completely rewired, forcing me to slow down, listen, and surrender to a process that was entirely out of my control… easier said than done.

“Why aren’t more women talking about this?” I kept saying to my friends… to those who already have children and those who have yet to start families. Most of the women who didn’t have kids yet had no idea what I was talking about when it came to the nausea and exhaustion of the first trimester, and women who had already been through it nodded that big nod of understanding… as if just the look in their eyes was saying, “I’ve been there too.” They shared their experiences containing many similarities to mine, as well as symptoms that I hadn’t experienced myself… but the common thread weaving all of our experiences together was strength. Despite the discomfort, fear, and uncertainty, each of us had found a way to push through… often quietly, often without much recognition, and emerge stronger on the other side. It reminded me how much power women carry within them, even in the moments when we feel our weakest and most isolated.

I thought I’d write this piece for the woman that feels caught between joy and uncertainty. The one who’s thrilled to be growing a life but also surprised by how hard it can be. Pregnancy is one of the most exciting things a woman can experience, but that doesn’t also mean it won’t be challenging, as all of the best things in life can be at times.

In the following paragraphs, I’ll share some of my own experiences during the first trimester, as well as those of other women who have walked through this stage before me. I’ll be sharing more of the real, unfiltered details — the things I wish someone had told me. From what the first trimester actually feels like, to weight gain, to how I’ve been navigating the physical and emotional changes, to the mindset shifts that have helped me find peace in the midst of it all. My hope is that by opening up about this part of the journey, you’ll feel a little less alone in yours and a little more prepared for what’s ahead…

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Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

It’s a euphoric feeling when something you’ve dreamed of your entire life finally comes true. A sense of wholeness, as if two puzzle pieces have fit perfectly together, paired with the ecstatic joy of seeing tangible proof that God might actually be real. Because after years of dreaming of this moment I can finally say it’s happening. We’re having a baby!

We are over the moon excited and filled with so much joy each day as our baby grows. My husband and I have been talking about the family we’ve dreamed of creating for so long… the fact that it’s finally here feels almost surreal.

I just entered my second trimester. Keeping this secret for the past few months has been such a challenge! When we found out we were pregnant, we knew what was best for us was to keep our news close to the chest. Being our first child, there was so much uncharted territory…. so many emotions, questions, and moments of quiet awe as we prepared for our lives to change forever. We wanted to take it all in privately, to soak up those first few weeks of wonder and protect the fragile beauty of this new beginning before sharing it with the world.

And if I’m being totally honest, there was a ton of anxiety as well. There were moments in those first few months where I was an anxious ball of nerves… so worried that something could go wrong. Afraid to allow myself to feel my joy fully because the thought of the worst case scenario was always looming in the background. Looking back, I wish I would have allowed myself to feel into the moment a little more and trust the process.

No one really talks about how tough the first trimester is. I was truly not prepared for the nausea and exhaustion and found myself late night scrolling on TikTok multiple times, watching videos of other women share their first trimester symptoms. How could I have not known how challenging this was?! It felt so isolating at times, and the feeling of defeat was frequent. I went from being my usual energetic self to someone who could barely keep her eyes open past 11 a.m.

But thank God around week 11, the first trimester symptoms started to fade. And now, being in our second trimester, it feels like I can finally celebrate with my whole heart. It feels VERY real now as my baby bump starts to present itself. The excitement of creating the baby registry and designing the nursery has begun to set in, and even though we have a ways to go before we meet our little one, I’m finally allowing myself to slow down and savor this season.

Pregnancy has already taught me so much about surrender… about trusting my body, trusting God, and releasing the illusion of control. I’ve learned that joy and fear can coexist, that strength sometimes looks like rest, and that the most beautiful things in life often unfold in their own divine timing.

As I step into this next chapter, I’m filled with so much gratitude. Gratitude for this miracle of creating life, for my husband, for the support of our friends and family, and for the woman I’m becoming through this process.

-Reid

✨favorite things this week✨

This week, I thought I’d share a few of my favorite things I’ve been using during my pregnancy so far…

• Perelel Health - I have been taking Perelel Health’s vitamins ever since trying to conceive. Their trimester-specific packs take the guesswork out of what your body needs, so you aren’t just taking a prenatal but a packet of everything your body needs at that specific time. I have also really enjoyed their cellular hydration powder as well as their Synbiotic Greens Powder since I at times struggle to get all of my nutrients in. Perelel has also been kind to give us a discount code… use code REIDCOX15 for 15% off your first order!

• HATCH Belly Oil - Love this belly oil! It isn’t oily and absorbs quickly. This is the only belly oil I’ve used so far but I really love the feel and clean ingredients. The bottle last’s a long time too! I’ll definitely be using it after my pregnancy as just a daily body moisturizer.

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

You’re Not Supposed to Be Good at It Yet | Start Before You’re Ready!

How to Finish the Year Strong | The 12 Week Year Method

Change Your Self Concept, Change Your Life

Your September Reset: 5 Steps to Finish the Year Strong

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

Last week we planted new grass seed in our yard, with the hopes that in a few weeks time we’d see tiny green sprouts pushing through the soil, turning our patches of dirt into a soft, vibrant lawn. How hard could it be? I thought. Little did I know, the upkeep would be a huge pain in the ass. Watering the lawn twice a day, always making sure the soil is wet, and then having to walk our dog multiple times a day since he isn’t allowed in the yard while the grass is growing…I know that might sound slightly dramatic, but it feels like our lawn has become a full-time job. Every time I look out the window, I find myself squinting, trying to spot any sign of progress, wondering if all this effort will actually pay off or if we’ve just been watering dirt for nothing.

It got me thinking…. We all go through stages in life where it feels like we are just waiting for our grass to grow. Constantly working towards a goal, pouring our hearts out, giving it everything we’ve got… all to wonder, Will the grass ever grow? Will my dream ever come true? Will I ever get that raise at work I’ve been slaving away for? Will I ever see the results from the hard work I’ve done in the gym? The feeling of consistently showing up and putting in the work while not seeing any clear results in the moment….

It can be the most frustrating feeling, but the truth is, this is the time where we are, in fact, growing. While I’m keeping the yard wet at all times and taking my dog on walks in the neighborhood- when sometimes I wish I could just let him out the back door, there is a TON going on underground. Tiny roots are forming all over the yard, and although I can’t see them quite yet, the water I’m giving them is what will cause the tiny blades of grass to slowly start popping up soon.

This is exactly how life works when we are pouring into a dream that we haven’t reaped the fruits of yet. It can feel like we are exerting all this energy and effort for nothing… but when did we as a culture become so entitled to immediate results and praise? We have been trained to think that if we don’t become an overnight success, then there’s no point and we might as well quit. But you don’t grow at all as a human from becoming an overnight success. You grow from showing up day after day and putting in the work, regardless of if you receive praise or approval in return.

That’s the thing about growth…it rarely happens on our timeline. You can do everything “right,” follow every instruction, and still not see results right away. There’s this awkward, uncomfortable in between period where it feels like you’re putting in all the work with nothing to show for it. It’s frustrating, but it’s also kind of beautiful. Because underneath the surface, things are happening. You just can’t see them yet.

This week, look for the areas in your life where you are frustrated and feel like you aren’t progressing at the speed you had hoped. How can you reframe the impatience and see how you ARE in fact growing? What are the lessons you are being called to learn that will cause you to look back on this time and think fondly? Because there will come a day when the waiting makes sense… when you realize the roots were forming beneath the surface all along. The effort, the doubt, the quiet days where nothing seemed to move forward—they were shaping you, preparing you for what’s next.

So for now, I’ll keep watering. Keep walking the dog. Keep waiting. Because maybe the real lesson here isn’t just about growing grass… it’s about learning patience, trusting the process, and remembering that even when it looks like nothing’s happening, something always is.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

How to Finish the Year Strong | The 12 Week Year Method

Change Your Self Concept, Change Your Life

Your September Reset: 5 Steps to Finish the Year Strong

Watch This Before You Turn 30 | Saturn Return & Entering Your Best Decade Yet

This September has been one for the books. As the weather has slowly begun to change, I’ve been embracing all the fall vibes. There’s something about this season that feels like a fresh start, and I’m soaking in every moment of it. Here are 10 things i’m into right now… from clean skincare to ways to keep our household organized.

1. Clean Makeup That Feels Like Skincare

   As I’ve gotten older, I wear makeup less and less. And when I do wear makeup, I am pulled toward the brands that are on the cleaner side of ingredients… one’s that nourish my skin rather than bombard it with chemicals. For me, Merit Beauty has been a god send when it comes to clean beauty and makeup that I actually look forward to wearing. Every single one of their products that I’ve tried so far feels like skincare… super nourishing and moisturizing, and gives me that natural glow we all want. I rarely wear sunscreen, but their Uniform Tinted Mineral SPF has been a game changer. It’s SPF 45 but doesn’t look oily. I wear it as a foundation now and I love it! My other favorite products by Merit that I use on a daily basis are the bronzer stick, blush balm, lip stick (which feels like chapstick), lip gloss, and on those days when I don’t feel like wearing any makeup I always throw on their Great Skin Serum for that instant glow.

2. Skylight Planner

   I’ve always been a girlie who likes to write everything down. I keep a planner in journal form and am not the biggest fan of keeping track of my schedule on my phone. HOWEVER, that makes things a bit tricky when you are trying to coordinate schedules with your significant. I recently started using the Skylight Planner which has been an absolute game changer for our family. It’s a digital planner you can hang on your wall or place on your kitchen counter in a place where everyone can see it. It also connects to your iCal app, so it’s easy to share events with each other. We've been loving this new gadget and the ease it’s brought to our lives.

3. Evening walks before dinner

   Now that the sun is slowly starting to set earlier and the weather has started to cool off, an evening stroll before dinner has been a wonderful way to wind down the day. Throwing on a good podcast and exploring our new neighborhood on foot has been a part of my day I look forward to most. What part of your day can you carve out a pocket of time just for yourself, where you can do something that puts your soul at ease?

4. Show me your mumu pajamas

   Pajamas are meant to be the comfiest item of clothing we own…. and also the cutest! I’ve been obsessed with Show Me Your Mumu’s silky PJ sets for a while now. Not only are they comfy and cute, but they are also super affordable. Here are some of my favorite sets, some of which are currently on sale!

5. Current Body Red Light Mask

   Since I don’t do botox or fillers, I am all about any cream or tool that will help me age gracefully…. and after using the Current Body red light mask for a month now I can say this device does just that. Red light therapy boosts collagen production for younger-looking skin, reducing wrinkles by 30% and improves plumpness by 57% in 8 weeks. And thanks to our partners at CurrentBody we have a discount code! Use code REIDCOX for 10% off your next purchase for anything on their website!

4. Fall Vibes

   Thank God it’s fall. This is my favorite part of the year. Why you ask? Because of the vibes! Piles of leaves in neighbors’ yards, pumpkin spice everything, candlelit cozy hangs with friends… it’s just the best. Even though we are at the very beginning of the season, it has not stopped me from jumping into all things fall headfirst. Now that we are settled in our new home, I’m so excited to decorate accordingly and make it feel warm and inviting. From stringing up twinkling lights to adding cozy blankets and autumn-scented candles around every corner, I want every inch of our space to scream fall comfort. There’s something magical about transforming a house into a home that reflects the season, and I can’t wait to soak in every cozy moment.

5. Furbish Studio Pillows

   Umm… literally obsessed with these pillows. Furbish has so many unique items on their website, but their pillows take the cake. Each pillow has a funny saying or quote on it, and their bright colors are eye catching. These make a great gift or a new addition to your home. If anything, they are great conversation starters!

8. A Good Docu-Series -

   Lately, my go to nightly programing is a good doc-series. This month I’ve been into The Keepers (recommended by my friend Lysette), The Octopus Murders, and Amy Bradley is Missing on Netflix. Be careful… these are certified binge-worthy!

9. The Pivot Year

   Brianna Wiest is one of my favorite writers, and her book The Pivot Year is nothing short of transformative. With the subtitle “365 Days to Become the Person You Truly Want to Be,” this book delivers daily messages that will draw you inward and encourage you to reflect on your own life and who you want to become. I’ve been reading a page every morning this year. It’s been a grounding way to start my day. Highly recommend!

10. Weekly Digital Detox

    I cannot be trusted with my phone anymore. The time has come when I have to make a serious effort to not check my phone at all times. I’ve realized that the constant urge to check my devices is mostly out of habit. So what do I need to do? Break the habit. The first way I've been doing that is a weekly digital detox where one night a week around 5 p.m., I throw my phone in a kitchen drawer and don’t touch it till the following morning. Setting aside one night a week to unplug from screens and scroll-free time has been surprisingly refreshing. I read, write, or just sit in quiet, and it resets my energy for the week.

And that’s a wrap! As September comes to a close, I can’t help but feel grateful for these little routines, products, and moments that are making this season extra special. From cozy fall rituals to tools that keep life running smoothly, each one has brought more ease and joy into my days. I hope you found something here that inspires you to slow down, savor the season, and maybe even try something new for yourself. Here’s to leaning fully into fall and all the comfort, growth, and fresh starts it brings.

-Reid

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Your September Reset: 5 Steps to Finish the Year Strong

Watch This Before You Turn 30 | Saturn Return & Entering Your Best Decade Yet

Single for a Long Time? Why Prioritizing Yourself Attracts the Right Partner

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS AS AN ADULT | 8 tips that will work for anyone.

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

Thank God it’s September. The greatest month of the entire year, In my opinion. Everything just seems to flow this time of year. September is the bridge from summer to fall, full of promise and possibility. As the heat wears off and the crisp fall morning air begins to creep in, I find myself feeling renewed, as though each cool breeze carries away the weight of what no longer serves me. As if it feels safe now to let go of all that defined me before. And as we let go, we also create space. Space for new thoughts, ideas, and ways of being that light up this brand new version of ourselves.

So far this September, I’ve been called to release “the hustle” and embrace more of an easeful way of life. After all, it’s what my body and soul have been craving, and the more I’ve pushed against it, the harder its made accomplishing the most menial tasks. It’s as if my future self is trying to make contact with my current self and show her that the only way I can become the person I am meant to be is if I am willing to do things differently.

We all get calls like this at different times in our lives. That inner voice telling us to make a shift, move, and try things a different way. It can feel scary to change…. in fact, I don’t think any season of growth is all that comfortable. Even as I’m being called to slow down, I find it insanely difficult not to push or force what I’m trying to create into existence the way I used to. But isn’t that a good sign? Change isn’t supposed to feel comfortable. And once we recognize this truth, we are able to lean into the discomfort, knowing it’s guiding us somewhere new, somewhere greater than what we could have forced.

So this September, ask yourself… What is my inner voice whispering to me right now? Where am I being nudged to release, to soften, to trust? Maybe it’s time to stop gripping so tightly to the old ways of doing things and open yourself to a new rhythm… one that feels lighter, freer, and more aligned. Because September isn’t just the turning of a season; it’s a chance for you to turn, too.

-Reid

✨favorite things this week✨

• Merit Beauty - No joke, I am a different woman after discovering Merit Beauty. If i’m wearing make up i’m going for the “no makeup” look and this brand does just that. I have been obsessed with their tinted spa which I now use instead of foundation… it is super moisturizing and not oily like most sunscreens (i’m shade 28.) Their lipstick and lip gloss doesn’t feel like you are putting chemicals on your lips, but instead it feels super moisturizing. Love the glow serum… love the bronze stick… you’ll have to try their products out for yourself. Here are my personal favorites.

• CurrentBody Red Light Mask - Since I don’t do botox or fillers I am ALL ABOUT any cream or tool that will help me age gracefully…. and after using the CurrentBody red light mask for a month now I can say this device does just that. Red light therapy boosts collagen production for younger-looking skin, reducing wrinkles by 30% and improves plumpness by 57% in 8 weeks. And thanks to our partners at CurrentBody we have a discount code! Use code REIDCOX for 10% off your next purchase for anything on their website!

• Lulu & Georgia Vase- I ADORE this vase from Lulu & Georgia. It is the perfect statement piece for a living room console or a dining room table centerpiece. I like this one in particular because it’s super funky and unique. Lulu & Georgia is doing a Labor Day SALE where everything is 25% site wide.

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Watch This Before You Turn 30 | Saturn Return & Entering Your Best Decade Yet

Single for a Long Time? Why Prioritizing Yourself Attracts the Right Partner

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS AS AN ADULT | 8 tips that will work for anyone.

How to Build Your DREAM LIFE in 5 Months!

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

Have you ever found yourself in a place in life where you ask yourself, “How the hell did I end up here?” Where you possibly feel regret about the past, confused in the present, and nervous for the future?

I’d bet money quite a few of us have felt this way before. It’s almost a rite of passage of being human. But here’s the thing: what if you’re not lost at all? What if, even in the confusion, you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be?

It can sometimes be hard to see or accept in the moment, but the saying “you are exactly where you need to be” is usually true.

Think about it: every experience, even the ones you wish you could erase, has shaped you into the person you are today. The mistakes, the detours, the heartbreaks, the jobs that didn’t work out… they’ve all been teachers. Sometimes the lesson is patience, sometimes it’s resilience, sometimes it’s learning to trust yourself when nothing feels certain, and sometimes the lesson is to not stay in a situation when you know it isn’t serving you.

When we’re in the thick of it, it’s easy to label a season as “wrong” or “wasted.” But often, those seasons are just planting seeds that haven’t bloomed yet. And when you look back years later, you realize that the timing, the struggle, even the waiting…it all added up to something you couldn’t see then.

When I look back on my life so far, I see every moment when I felt stuck or confused as the moments right before a massive shift occurred. Those moments were necessary to get me to where I am today. Perhaps the seasons of our past where we felt lost and unsure are there to serve as a roadmap for our future… their purpose being to reassure us that there is always a way out and we are stronger and more resilient than we may think

And maybe that’s the whole point. The waiting rooms of life… the ones that feel unbearable… are actually where we’re being prepared for what’s next. It doesn’t mean we have to love them, but if we can trust them, we’ll move through them with a little more peace.

So if you’re in that place right now, questioning everything and wishing you were further along, take a deep breath. You are not behind. You are not off course. You are being shaped, strengthened, and guided in ways you might not understand yet.

You are exactly where you need to be.

-Reid

✨favorite things this week✨

• Merit Beauty - No joke, I am a different woman after discovering Merit Beauty. If i’m wearing make up i’m going for the “no makeup” look and this brand does just that. I have been obsessed with their tinted spa which I now use instead of foundation… it is super moisturizing and not oily like most sunscreens (i’m shade 28.) Their lipstick and lip gloss doesn’t feel like you are putting chemicals on your lips, but instead it feels super moisturizing. Love the glow serum… love the bronze stick… you’ll have to try their products out for yourself. Here are my personal favorites.

• CurrentBody Red Light Mask - Since I don’t do botox or fillers I am ALL ABOUT any cream or tool that will help me age gracefully…. and after using the CurrentBody red light mask for a month now I can say this device does just that. Red light therapy boosts collagen production for younger-looking skin, reducing wrinkles by 30% and improves plumpness by 57% in 8 weeks. And thanks to our partners at CurrentBody we have a discount code! Use code REIDCOX for 10% off your next purchase for anything on their website!

• Lulu & Georgia Vase- I ADORE this vase from Lulu & Georgia. It is the perfect statement piece for a living room console or a dining room table centerpiece. I like this one in particular because it’s super funky and unique. Lulu & Georgia is doing a Labor Day SALE where everything is 25% site wide.

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

Single for a Long Time? Why Prioritizing Yourself Attracts the Right Partner

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDS AS AN ADULT | 8 tips that will work for anyone.

REFORMATION Try On Haul | 5 Stunning Dresses for Special Occasions!

How to Build Your DREAM LIFE in 5 Months!

Hi, I’m Reid! I write about my life experiences and how we can all live in brave new ways. Dare You is a reader-supported publication. To receive weekly posts and support my work, please consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 💗

Subscribe now

My good friend Jodi came to visit us last week. On her last night here, my husband and I took her out to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants walking distance from our home. We are very much the kind of people who enjoy living in a community where we can walk to restaurants and have that “city vibe” that feels like connection is at our fingertips. We sat at the bar and almost immediately saw someone we knew… and then we met someone new… and then we exchanged numbers with the owner of the restaurants wife.

“How are you so good at meeting new people!?” Jodi asked. And before I could reply, she followed up with, “You should write a blog about it!” So this is me writing a blog about it….

I must admit, I do pride myself on making friends with strangers in the oddest places… I mean, I met one of my best friends, Sami, at a Whole Foods! And while I do believe that I naturally have an open and curious personality that makes it easy to connect with others, I also know for a fact that anyone can create a community that fills their cup if they choose to do so.

Having moved to new cities multiple times and created friendships that are fulfilling and last even when one person moves away, I know now that it’s always possible to find your people anywhere in the world. So if you are someone who just moved to a new city, struggles to make new friends, or you are craving a community that embraces you with open arms… here are my top tips for how to build community starting from scratch.

1. Don’t be afraid to look stupid

   it’s easy to fall into the trap of being afraid that if you ask someone to hang out, they will say no, and you will feel embarrassed for even trying. But friendship is like dating… not everyone is going to see your greatness, and not everyone is a match. Also, like dating, making friends requires you to put yourself out there in honest and vulnerable ways. That can be scary, and it’s totally natural to feel nervous when asking someone to hang out for the first time. But it is ALWAYS worth trying. Don’t be afraid to be shot down or have someone flake on you… it doesn’t reflect poorly on you but instead shows how brave you are for putting yourself out there.

2. Skip the table and sit at the bar

   I learned this one from my parents because they always choose to sit at the bar when they go out to eat. Now, it’s one of me and my husband’s favorite things to do, and it’s been one of the easiest ways we’ve made new friends in our new city. When you sit at the bar, you are more likely to start up a chat with the people sitting next to you, and even if you don’t become lifelong friends, they are usually always very interesting conversations. Also, MAKE FRIENDS WITH YOUR SERVERS. Not only does it feel nice to become “ a regular” a restaurant and have the servers know your name every time you walk in, but the servers will also introduce you to other regulars at the bar. It’s a no brainer.

3. Write people’s names down

   Open up your notes app in your phone and create a note that says “neighbors and people I meet” or something like that. Now, every time you meet someone at a restaurant, a party, or out and about, WRITE THEIR NAME DOWN. I am someone who forgets people’s names easily, but when I write them down on my notes app, I always remember them. I’ll write their name down and the place that I met them or a physical trait that will help me remember them. So next time you run into the person, you wont be freaking out having forgotten their name.

4. Ask questions

   If you find yourself nervous to make conversation with someone, or a conversation is in a bit of a lull, when in doubt… ask questions! By asking questions, you not only put the other person at ease but you make them feel special and you also get to know them. It shows the other person you are interested, which will, in turn, make them interested in you.

5. Invite random people to hang out in a group setting

   The best way to build community is to invite multiple people to hang out at once. If you have met a few new people that you want to become friends with but are a bit nervous about how to start the friendship, bring them into a group so A. It’s not awkward and B. You are building community and connecting people who would have never met if it wasn’t for you! Even if they don’t connect with you, they may connect you with someone else, which is awesome! And you never know… you could be starting an amazing friend group that you will go on to share many memories with in the years to come!

Making friends and creating community doesn’t have to be complicated…it’s about showing up, being open, and making small moves that signal to others, “I’m here, and I want to connect.” Whether it’s chatting with a stranger at the bar, remembering someone’s name, or sending that “let’s hang out” text even when you’re nervous, each step adds up.

The truth is, connection is everywhere if you’re willing to look for it. Every city, every neighborhood, every coffee shop is full of people who could end up becoming the friends you’ll text in the middle of the night, travel with, or sit with through life’s ups and downs. You just have to be brave enough to start the conversation.

So next time you’re out, smile at someone new, ask a question, or invite a small group to hang out. You never know…you might be one hello away from a lifelong friendship.

-Reid

✨favorite things this week✨

• Hunter Boots: I am OBSESSED with my new tall black rain boots. I’ve been pairing them with cute shorts or a mini skirt to keep me looking stylish and feeling good on these last few rainy days of summer.

• Merit Beauty Tinted Mineral Sunscreen: I have a confession to make… I literally never wear sunscreen. I have just never been able to find a face sunscreen that isn’t greasy or makes my face oily. UNTIL, I found thins tinted spf 45 by Merit Beauty! I am being so serious when I say this stuff is a game changer. It blends in so well with my skin and feels more like a tented moisturizer than a sunscreen. I am shade 28.

• Lulu and Georgia Candle Holder: Ummm… I need these iron candle holders.

📹 Meanwhile on Youtube: 📹

REFORMATION Try On Haul | 5 Stunning Dresses for Special Occasions!

How to Build Your DREAM LIFE in 5 Months!

Why Eloping in Hawaii Was the BEST Decision We Ever Made | 6 Months Married!...